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More Jokes

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    How To Please Your I.T. Department

    How To Please Your I.T. Department [A quick check list for those who need to make…
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    Five Steps to a Healthy Diet

    Five Steps to a Healthy DietThe Federal Drug and Food Administration is planning to issue…
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    Overboard Rescue

    Passengers aboard a luxurious cruise ship were having a great time when a beautiful young…
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    Dining In

    My husband and I both work, so our family eats out a lot.Recently, when we were having a…
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    Boring Flight

    Bored during a long flight, an eminent scholar leaned over and woke up the sleeping man…
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    How Hot Is It?

    How hot is it? The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground. The…
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    Rules for Laboratory Workers

    Rules for Laboratory Workers 1. When you don't know what you're doing, do it neatly. 2.…
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    Soup Solution

    Customer: Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!Waiter: Don't worry, sir. The frog should…
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    Rolls-Royce Loaner

    When I arrived at a friend's home for a party, my old rattletrap looked pretty shabby…
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    Weddings and Funerals

    Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling…
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    The Buck Stops Where?

    A one-dollar bill met a twenty-dollar bill and said, "Hey, where have you been? I haven't…
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    What Don't You Have?

    An elderly man went to the doctor for a visit. "Doc," he says," I am so stricken. I have…
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    Beware of Dog

    Upon entering a little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying "DANGER! BEWARE…
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    Doctor Mistake

    During the course of being interviewed by the press, the noted doctor was asked by a…
1.  Everyone has a photographic memory.  Some don't have film.
2.  He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
3.  A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
4.  On the other hand, you have different fingers.
5.  Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
6.  Back up my hard drive?  How do I put it in reverse?
7.  I just got lost in thought.  It was unfamiliar territory.
8.  When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.
9.  Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
10.  Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
11.  I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
12.  He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.
13.  She's always late.  Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower.
14.  You have the right to remain silent.  Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
15.  I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges?
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