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More Jokes

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    Basic Training

    For some recruits, there is nothing basic about basic training. It was clear that one…
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    Kids' Kitchen Terms

    Kids' Kitchen TermsBOIL: The point a parent reaches upon hearing the automatic "Yuck"…
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    All Roads Lead Back to Rome

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    Vet's Guarantee

    There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working…
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    Flossing

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    Cutting Class

    "Jill," a teacher reprimanded the teenager in the hall, "do you mind telling me whose…
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    That's It

    A general noticed one of his soldiers behaving oddly. The soldier would pick up any piece…
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    Feeding Shamu

    At Sea World, our grandson absolutely refused to see the show featuring Shamu the killer…
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    Goober Counsellor

    A goober began a job as an elementary school counsellor, and she was eager to help. One…
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    Lost Pigs

    Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is entered…
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    The Bethelehem Innkeeper's Top 10 Excuses

    Here are the top ten excuses the Bethlehem Innkeeper gave for not giving Joseph and Mary…
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    Blind Pilots

    One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated, waiting…
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    No Stairs

    An elderly lady, who lived on the third floor of a boardinghouse, broke her leg. As the…
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    Loudest Band

    For two years I managed a group of musicians who proudly labeled themselves "the loudest…
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    Add Some Fun To Life

    Add Some Fun To Life Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'IN'. Page yourself…

What do you say when you get a gift you *Really Don't Like*.

10. "Well, well, well, now, there's a gift!"

9. "No, with all the hostile takeovers this year, I missed the big Ronco/K-Tel/Ginsu merger. Would you just look at that! What will they think of next?!"

8. "Hey, as long as I don't have to feed it, or clean up after it, or put batteries in it, I'm happy!"

7. "No, really, I didn't know that there was a Chia Pet tie! Oh, wow! It's a clip-on too!"

6. "You know, I always wanted one of these! Jog my memory -- what's it called again?"

5. "You know what? -- I'm going to find a special place to put this!"

4. "Boy, you don't see craftsmanship like that every day!"

3. "And it's such an interesting color too!"

2. "You say that was the last one? Am I ever glad that you snapped that baby up!"

And the number one thing to say about the Christmas gifts you didn't like is: "You shouldn't have! I mean it -- you really shouldn't have!"

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