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More Jokes

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    Inferior Bags

    It was very crowded at the supermarket, and the customer in front of me had a large…
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    Keyboard Jockey Exercise

    For those keyboard jockeys (those with jobs that require sitting at a computer all day)…
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    Not as Bad as They Say

    Thanks to my good, Texan friend Walter Smith for this one.Chuck was sitting in an…
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    Reasons Not To Wash

    If you took the same excuses that people use for not going to church and apply them to…
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    Quick Thinking Clerk

    There is a story about a new clerk in a supermarket. A customer asked him if she could…
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    Words to Ponder

    *Words to Ponder* Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. I'd kill…
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    Election Poetry

    In olden times, it could be decades before major events were cast in verse. But The Great…
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    No Contraband

    After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother…
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    The Pledge

    Grandpa Cartnell was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how…
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    Daytime Television

    A newspaper reporter was writing a feature story about prison life and was interviewing…
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    Drag Racing Moped

    A hip young man goes out and buys the best car available: a 2005 Turbo Z123DX. It is the…
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    Catching Fish

    A guy had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without…
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    Laundry Husband

    One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he…
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    Puppy Love

    For months he had been her devoted admirer. Now, at long last, he had collected up…
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    That's Hospital Coverage!

    Mr. Smith was brought to Mercy Hospital (a Catholic hospital), and taken quickly in for…
10. His face permanently blackened like a cartoon bomb went off

9. Pushes his personal brand of 'pull start' furnaces

8. Dave Lennox beat him up once

7. Uses magnifying glass and really bright flashlight to try and re-light furnace

6. Assures you his new efficient furnace only emits "CO2 Lite"

5. The instruction manual he leaves behind just says, "Light fuse, get away"

4. Tools consist of duct tape, tin foil, and a rabbit's foot

3. Estimates your bill by shaking a bag of chicken bones

2. You notice his furnace filters all say "Mr. Coffee" on them

1. When firemen arrive, they all say his name in unison

Copyright 2006 Dave Tippett (This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.). Permission is granted to send this to others, with attribution, but not for commercial purposes.
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