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More Jokes

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    Excerpts From "A Cat's Guide To Human Beings"

    1. Introduction: Why Do We Need Humans?So you've decided to get yourself a human being.…
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    Parts is Parts

    A parts manager for a small electronics shop, had occasion to order part No. 669 from the…
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    Vow Changes

    Ken and Melba had finished their breakfast at the retirement home and were relaxing in…
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    Next Question

    In my sociology class, we were instructed to write down answers to some questions the…
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    Things That Make You Go "Ummmmmmm????"

    If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? Instead of talking to your…
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    Honest Mechanic

    I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off, so I was relieved when he told me…
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    Mail Problems

    Thanks to Kim Harding for day's real life laugh from her family. Dear Pastor Tim, This is…
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    Lost Bid

    Bidding at a local auction was proceeding furiously when the auctioneer suddenly…
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    The Place for Grace

    When little Johnny received his plate he started eating right away."Johnny wait until we…
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    Lost Bible

    The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the…
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    More Bulletin Bloopers

    Several members who have been in the hospital are not on their way to recovery, for which…
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    Procedure Recall

    As a resident physician in radiology, I was speaking with the man whose wife was about to…
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    Memento

    Friend: "I suppose you carry a memento of some sort in that locket of yours?" Woman:…
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    Mint Mom

    When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become…
10. His face permanently blackened like a cartoon bomb went off

9. Pushes his personal brand of 'pull start' furnaces

8. Dave Lennox beat him up once

7. Uses magnifying glass and really bright flashlight to try and re-light furnace

6. Assures you his new efficient furnace only emits "CO2 Lite"

5. The instruction manual he leaves behind just says, "Light fuse, get away"

4. Tools consist of duct tape, tin foil, and a rabbit's foot

3. Estimates your bill by shaking a bag of chicken bones

2. You notice his furnace filters all say "Mr. Coffee" on them

1. When firemen arrive, they all say his name in unison

Copyright 2006 Dave Tippett (This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.). Permission is granted to send this to others, with attribution, but not for commercial purposes.
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