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More Jokes

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    Physics Purpose

    One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med…
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    Foot Pill

    A man limped into a hospital to have his foot X-rayed, and was asked to wait for the…
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    In the Dorm

    In the dorm, one of the favorite intramural sports was water fights: dousing and…
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    The Gas Men

    Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out…
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    Texas Vacation

    A couple was relating their vacation experiences to a friend. "It sounds as if you had a…
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    Parking Lot Stay

    I pulled into the crowded parking lot at a Super Wal-Mart Shopping Center and rolled down…
  • freezer

    Freezer Order

    I have my own system for labeling homemade freezer meals. Forget calling them "Veal…
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    Sunday Funnies

    One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was "acting up" during the morning worship…
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    Shower Music

    "Somebody just gave me a shower radio. Thanks a lot. Do you really want music in the…
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    Older Parents

    We had our ten-year-old daughter late in life, long after our two boys were born. She is…
  • woman old

    End Nail Biting

    Two elderly women were fussing about their husbands over tea one day. "I do wish my Leroy…
  • picture of letters

    How To Speak English Properly

    *How to speak English Properly* Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects. Prepositions are…
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    Lost in the Woods

    Two hunters got lost in the woods. The first hunter said, "Don't worry. All we have to do…
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    Changing Plates

    My friend called his car insurance company to tell them to change his address from Texas…
  • knee bones

    Sore Knee

    Old man Johnson limped into the doctor's office and said, "Doc, my right knee hurts so…

lemon*Top Ten Signs You've Bought a Lemon of a Car*

10. Your tinted windows are also known as Hefty Garbage Bags.

9. The car reaches its optimum speed when going downhill.

8. The hi-tech stereo system often requires a new needle.

7. The rear-view mirror says, "Objects in Mirror Are Better Than This Piece of Junk."

6. The odometer on the dashboard is not as sophisticated as the everyday abacus.

5. Traffic Watch warns other drivers what highway you're taking.

4. The sticker on the windshield says, "Batteries Not Included."

3. You fill up the tank with Unleaded Coals.

2. You can only go to restaurants that offer Valet Pushing.

1. When you approach hitchhikers, they put their thumbs down.

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