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    Resume Examples

    These are real examples from real resumes:*Reasons For Leaving Last Job*- Responsibility…
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    Today I didn't Do It

    One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three…
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    Cow Help

    A man was driving down a country road in the middle of dairy farm country when his car…
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    Tired and Thirsty

    Three students are leaving their last classes of the day.The law student is thinking,…
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    Quips to Ponder

    If your life takes a turn for the worse, remember that you are the one who is driving! My…
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    Unwise Application Lines

    Readers of the Washington Post were asked to compose a very unwise line for a college…
  • Mount Union College Ohio

    Medieval History

    My friend, an American history professor at Mount Union College in Ohio, was asked to…
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    Yellow Canaries

    A lady went to a pet shop."I'd like to buy two yellow canaries," she told the owner."We…
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    Goober Hunters Flying

    Two Goober hunters got a pilot to fly them into the far north for elk hunting. They were…
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    Phone Calls

    Caller: I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff, please. Operator: I'm…
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    Bathroom Instructions

    On the first day of school, the Kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone has to go to the…
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    Rules for Editing

    Some of you have noticed a few typos in the CleanLaugh list now and then. To improve this…
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    Real Newspaper Ads

    These are real ads from a newspaper. 1. 1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850 or best offer 2.…
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    Kitten Revival

    A mother looked out a window and saw Johnny playing church with their three kittens. He…
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    Sign Return

    I was on board the USS Kitty Hawk when we docked in the Sri Lankan capital, Colombo.One…

10. Apologize to neighbors about the tripwire incident...offer to replace dog.

9. Take up pork & beans skeet shooting.

8. Gather recipes for Spam, dehydrated potatoes, and crow.

7. Cancel subscription to Stockpilers Quarterly, but keep the free can opener.

6. Convert weapons back to semi-auto.

5. Pitch "1000 Ideas for Wheat Gluten" to Martha Stewart's people.

4. Return 753 videos to Blockbuster.

3. Water yard...one lousy gallon at a time.

2. Find grocery store receipt for 10,000 packets of Ramen noodles.

1. Make friends with the 6 billion other Y2K survivors.

 

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