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More Jokes

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    Astute Visionaries?

    "Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons."--Popular Mechanics,…
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    Things Moms Would Never Say

    ~ "How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?"~ "Yeah, I used to skip school a…
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    Exact Address

    Torrential rainstorms were knocking down power lines all over town. That meant, as a…
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    The Big Sale

    It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale and an advertisement in the local…
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    Dad Shopping

    In the frozen foods department of our local grocery store, I noticed a man shopping with…
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    Out of This World Bait

    My daughter-in-law Alma and grandson Eddy were digging for fishing bait in my garden.…
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    Keep Walking

    An eight year old boy is walking down the road one day when a car pulls over next to him.…
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    Soup Objects

    The truck driver looked suspiciously at the soup he had just been served in an eatery. It…
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    Locked Out

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Pig Feed

    There was a farmer who had many pigs. One day someone went to the farm and asked the…
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    Bad Flight

    While ferrying workers back and forth from an offshore oil rig, the helicopter lost power…
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    Movie Night

    My wife was complaining that I spend too much time on the computer, and not enough time…
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    Goober Release

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Purse Contents

    As the bus pulled away, I realized I had left my purse under the seat. Later I called the…
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    Happy Birthday Line

    Because of a minor infraction, a shipmate of mine aboard the USS Reeves, bound for Japan,…

a toy carHonest Toy Disclaimers

* No beanies or babies harmed in the manufacture of this product.

* Warning: This fad will disappear in 6 weeks.

* Caution: Care Bears do not actually care very much.

* Warning: This toy produces substantially less childish glee in real life than it does in the TV commercial.

* Do not purchase this toy at all. Put it back on the shelf! NOW!! Just walk away, timid little man.

* Do not stare at product. Hey! You're doing it now! Cut that out!!

* In case of breakage, scream until dad buys a replacement.

* Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously.

* Use as an actual terrorist device not recommended.

* Do not attempt to combine your Ultra Mega Warrior with your cat to make Ultra Mega Cat Warrior.

* NOTE: The makers of "Queen Amidala's Naboo Dream Palace" assume no responsibility for the quality of the movie which spawned it.

* Some assimilation required. Resistance is futile.

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