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More Jokes

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    Mother And Child

    A tiny but dignified old lady was among a group looking at an art exhibition in a newly…
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    First Day

    Little Johnny was thrilled when his turn came to enter kindergarten. To make sure he had…
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    Kissing Son

    I was in line at a restaurant. In front of me was a mother with her college-age son and…
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    Think You're Having A Bad Day?

    So you think you're having a bad day. A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio…
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    Hans Olaffsen's Laundry

    Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants,…
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    Good News Dewey

    Olga phoned her husband, Dewey, at work for a chat. "I'm sorry dear," said Dewey, "but…
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    Jericho Walls

    The new pastor decided to visit the children's Sunday school. The teacher introduced him…
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    100 GB

    Experts warned today of a new and deadly threat to our beleaguered civilization: the…
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    The Importance of Correct Punctuation

    We've all been told how important it is to use correct punctuation. Well, here is a…
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    Chute Error

    While being transported to basic training as a new enlistee of the Air National Guard, I…
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    Mummy Heart Failure

    An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a casket…
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    Finding The Cat's Diary

    Day 752 - My captors continue to haunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine…
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    Singing Practice

    Joe's wife likes to sing. She decided to join the church choir. From time to time she…
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    Eating Worms

    Little Johnny sat playing in the garden. When his mother came out to collect him, she saw…
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    Flight Observation

    On a recent flight, an elderly passenger kept peering out the window. Since it was…

a toy carHonest Toy Disclaimers

* No beanies or babies harmed in the manufacture of this product.

* Warning: This fad will disappear in 6 weeks.

* Caution: Care Bears do not actually care very much.

* Warning: This toy produces substantially less childish glee in real life than it does in the TV commercial.

* Do not purchase this toy at all. Put it back on the shelf! NOW!! Just walk away, timid little man.

* Do not stare at product. Hey! You're doing it now! Cut that out!!

* In case of breakage, scream until dad buys a replacement.

* Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously.

* Use as an actual terrorist device not recommended.

* Do not attempt to combine your Ultra Mega Warrior with your cat to make Ultra Mega Cat Warrior.

* NOTE: The makers of "Queen Amidala's Naboo Dream Palace" assume no responsibility for the quality of the movie which spawned it.

* Some assimilation required. Resistance is futile.

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