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    Lost Turnabout

    Driving to a new restaurant, a woman took several wrong turns. When she finally found the…
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    Deputy Goober

    The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so Goober - who was not exactly the sharpest…
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    Oil Spill

    After a lady's car had leaked motor oil on her cement driveway, she bought a large bag of…
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    Fee Surprise

    Two brawny men came to my house to install some new floor covering in the kitchen. Once…
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    Parting Words

    A pastor was leaving his area and was saying farewell to his congregation at the Church…
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    Three Red Lights

    Two elderly women were out driving in a large car. Neither could barely see over the…
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    The Haircut

    A young man had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister,…
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    Reasons Why Farm Trucks Are Never Stolen

    * They have a range of about 20 miles before they overheat, break down or run out of…
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    Grocery Pickup

    Soon after my 16-year-old sister started working after school as a grocery-store cashier,…
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    You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee When

    You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee When . . .* You can type sixty words a minute with…
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    Seeing Eye Dogs

    Two men are walking their dogs. The first guy has a doberman, and the second guy has a…
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    Coast Guard Lingo

    When my husband joined the Coast Guard, I knew there would be some adjustments. Not only…
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    Before And After Falling In Love

    B - You take my breath awayA - I feel like I'm suffocating B - She says she loves the way…
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    Hymns vs. Choruses

    THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HYMNS AND PRAISE CHORUSES An old farmer went to the city one…
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    Grandpa Cut Up

    Many years ago, a grandfather bought a hobby horse by mail order as a birthday present…

Dear Abby:

I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can't afford to spend a lot of money to do it.

Any suggestions?

Sam in California

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Dear Sam:

Yes. Run for public office.

Abby

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