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More Jokes

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    More One-liners

    I can see clearly now, the brain is gone... Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay. Madness…
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    Behavior Modification

    One morning I was called to pick up my son at the school nurse's office.When I walked…
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    Hawaii Pronunciation

    Morris and his wife Sherry were planning a vacation. They ended up in an argument. "It's…
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    Diagnosis

    The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an…
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    Homework Surprise

    My daughter's third-grade teacher had assigned the children to write a story titled "My…
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    First Date Nerves

    A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks…
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    Puppy Power

    Officer Roland, near the end of his shift, noticed a woman driving a small pickup truck…
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    Houdini Wannabe

    A deputy police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The "disturbance"…
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    Looking For Mike

    After directory assistance gave Glenda her boyfriend's new telephone number, she dialed…
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    Art That Sells

    An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any recent interest in his paintings…
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    Transcribing Confusion

    We were thoroughly confused. While transcribing medical audiotapes, my co-worker came…
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    Lawyer Light Bulb

    Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?A: Such number as may be deemed…
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    Bathroom Exasperation

    As the lone female in our house, I find that certain male habits have really begun to get…
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    Yesterday Computer Song

    Do you know the song "Yesterday"? Then sing along to this computer version. Yesterday,…
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    Waist Deep

    While driving through Buffalo after a heavy snow storm, a motorist noted a cop,…

* Freeway congestion is getting so bad, you can change a tire without losing your place in line.

* All across the country rush hour traffic is bumper to bumper. The next thing they'll be selling is antiperspirant to put under your car's fenders.

* Traffic is always heavy in both directions. There are just as many people trying to get to whatever you're trying to get away from.

* You have mixed feelings when you see an opening in rush hour traffic. You're glad for the opening, but you wonder who died.

* It's useless to print roadmaps anymore. You just get on the highway and go wherever the other cars take you.

* The only way to get home from work on time is to take the day off... even then, you're cutting it close.

* Traffic is so bad nowadays, a pedestrian is someone in a hurry.

* You can sit on the highways forever. In fact, some places have little exit ramps where you can pull over and make a car payment.

* During rush hour the only way you can change lanes is to buy the car driving next to you.

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