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    Sick Day

    Our local newspaper ran several stories about a study that tied male obesity to a virus.…
  • police pull over

    Name Warning

    On a street, where the speed is limited to 30 mph the police stop a driver. "Not only…
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    Neighborhood Explosion

    The whole neighborhood shook from the explosion. As shopkeepers ran outside to see what…
  • picture of old speedometer

    Missing Car Parts

    A goober calls 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is…
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    Construction Noise

    During a beautiful spring afternoon, I was attending a music festival. Just as I stopped…
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    Plane Seat

    It was Judi's first plane trip.Boarding the aircraft she settled into a window seat in…
  • teacher

    Meet Me For Lunch

    The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining…
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    Vacation Location

    A vacationer e-mailed a seaside hotel to ask its location. "It's only a stone's throw…
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    Dad Sayings

    I figured out why they call our language the "Mother Tongue." Fathers never get a chance…
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    Campaign Funding

    Can you believe a candidate dropped out of the race because of a lack of campaign funds?…
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    Bad Day Sign

    You know it's going to be a bad day when your teenager knocks on your bedroom door first…
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    Interactive Weather

    Our part of the country had gone for weeks with little or no rain. The TV weatherman, on…
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    Wake Up Call

    An elderly gentleman checked into a New York hotel. The clerk mentioned the phone service…
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    Doctor Quotes

    The following quotes were allegedly taken from actual medical records as dictated by…
  • picture of eyeglasses

    Looking Back

    Soon after our last child left home for college, my husband was resting next to me on the…

* Freeway congestion is getting so bad, you can change a tire without losing your place in line.

* All across the country rush hour traffic is bumper to bumper. The next thing they'll be selling is antiperspirant to put under your car's fenders.

* Traffic is always heavy in both directions. There are just as many people trying to get to whatever you're trying to get away from.

* You have mixed feelings when you see an opening in rush hour traffic. You're glad for the opening, but you wonder who died.

* It's useless to print roadmaps anymore. You just get on the highway and go wherever the other cars take you.

* The only way to get home from work on time is to take the day off... even then, you're cutting it close.

* Traffic is so bad nowadays, a pedestrian is someone in a hurry.

* You can sit on the highways forever. In fact, some places have little exit ramps where you can pull over and make a car payment.

* During rush hour the only way you can change lanes is to buy the car driving next to you.

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