* Freeway congestion is getting so bad, you can change a tire without losing your place in line.
* All across the country rush hour traffic is bumper to bumper. The next thing they'll be selling is antiperspirant to put under your car's fenders.
* Traffic is always heavy in both directions. There are just as many people trying to get to whatever you're trying to get away from.
* You have mixed feelings when you see an opening in rush hour traffic. You're glad for the opening, but you wonder who died.
* It's useless to print roadmaps anymore. You just get on the highway and go wherever the other cars take you.
* The only way to get home from work on time is to take the day off... even then, you're cutting it close.
* Traffic is so bad nowadays, a pedestrian is someone in a hurry.
* You can sit on the highways forever. In fact, some places have little exit ramps where you can pull over and make a car payment.
* During rush hour the only way you can change lanes is to buy the car driving next to you.