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  • funeral joke with a tuxedo

    Do Something Nice

    Unable to attend the funeral after his Uncle Charlie died, a man who lived far away…
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    Gifts for Men

    Buying gifts for men is not nearly as complicated as it is for women. Follow these rules…
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    A Good Haircut

    Our supervisor recently made a casual comment about my shaggy mane of hair. He then went…
  • picture of rain on window

    Dark and Stormy Ride

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    John Will Be Fine

    The manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and told him to come into his…
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    Sign Fun

    *Sign Fun*On a California freeway: Fine for LitteringIn the window of an Atlanta clothing…
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    The Half Cake Diet

    A woman in our diet club was lamenting that she had gained weight.She'd made her family's…
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    Laws of Parenthood

    There is the Law of Gravity - And then, there is the Law of ParenthoodA child's behavior…
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    Signs the Childhood is Over

    Just one peanut butter and jelly sandwich doesn't do it anymore. Driving a car doesn't…
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    Yosemite Bears

    A married couple was vacationing in Yosemite. The wife expressed her concern about…
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    Hamster Care

    After buying her kids a pet hamster, after they PROMISED they would take care of it, Mom,…
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    Not For Lunch

    My husband retired, and for the first time in over 40 years I had to think about…
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    Charity Answer

    Father O'Shea, the parish priest in the village, was giving a sermon about charity. He…
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    Signs You Are an Elementary School Teacher

    You are probably an elementary school teacher if:~ You ask guests if they have remembered…
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    Just Pretend

    Although this married couple enjoyed their new fishing boat together, it was the husband…

car old1. Your passenger seat is on the National Register of Historic Places.

2. Instead of an airbag, there's a whoopee cushion taped to your steering wheel.

3. You lose the stop-light challenge to a 14-year old on a moped.

4. 15-Minute Jiffy Lube lasts for only 3 days.

5. Thieves repeatedly break into your car just to take "The Club."

6. When you gas up, the attendant asks "Can I re-duct-tape that windshield for you?"

7. While waiting at stop light, people run up asking if anyone was hurt.

8. For the last five years, you've had to settle for making "vroom vroom" noises while sitting in the driveway.

9. You keep losing dates on left turns.

10. Your gas gauge measures in cubits.

11. Traffic reporters are starting to refer to you by name when discussing morning tie-ups.

12. It hasn't been the same since Henry Ford borrowed it.

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