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More Jokes

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    Address Change

    My friend called his car insurance company to tell them to change his address from Texas…
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    Get Moving

    While driving with my granddaughter, I was getting annoyed with the driver ahead of me…
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    Proper Attire

    Proper attire is required in the cafeteria at the University of Maine. To enforce that…
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    The Gas Men

    Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out…
  • man shopping

    Can't Take It With You

    "You just go ahead," the man in the shopping mall said to his wife. "While you're…
  • cat on roof

    Bachelor's Cat

    A bachelor kept a cat for companionship, and loved his cat more than life itself. He was…
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    Resume Examples

    These are real examples from real resumes:*Reasons For Leaving Last Job*- Responsibility…
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    Grandma and Computer

    The computer's swallowed grandmaYes' honestly' its true.She pressed 'control' and…
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    The Verge

    A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' Mother's name?"One child…
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    Baseball Basics

    At one point during a game, the baseball coach said to one of his young players, "Do you…
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    Accident Prayer

    As my five-year-old-son and I were headed to McDonald's one day, we passed a car…
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    Jumper

    At the local Starbucks, a little guy exchanged words with a big bald guy and it looked…
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    Lost Pigs

    Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is entered…
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    Blind Date Slap

    An 85-year-old widow went on a blind date with a 90-year-old man. When she returned to…
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    Proposal Condition

    Kurt was going out with a nice girl and finally popped the question. "Will you marry me,…

1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my PAPER newspaper like I used to, before the Web.

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.

3) I will get dressed before noon.

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web.

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived.

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web.

7) I will read a book...if I still remember how.

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web.

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web.

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime...and the Web will always be there tomorrow!

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