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More Jokes

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    Actual Signs

    Bucharest Hotel Lobby - "The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time you…
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    Diet Additive

    During one of our weekly weight-loss classes, the group leader was extolling the merits…
  • Dog Waits for Owner

    Missing You

    Dave went on a business trip for a few days. When he returned, his wife reported that the…
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    Mom's Bath Note

    Dear Kids, Don't be alarmed, the world isn't coming to an end. I am simply taking a bath.…
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    More things you would never know without the movies

    The more a man and a woman hate each other, the more likely they will fall in love... The…
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    Rabbi Returns

    I returned to my parents' home to attend a funeral. At the temple, my mother led me to a…
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    Athletics Anonymous

    These days, with all the emphasis on one's physical fitness, a new organization has…
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    Careful Pulling The Plug

    Out in Kansas, tornadoes often hit with sudden devastation, and without warning. In one…
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    Stuffed Pockets

    A small boy stunned his parents after church one Sunday when he began to empty his…
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    Stolen Truck

    The young goober came running into the store and said to his buddy, "Jake, somebody just…
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    Burns and Benny

    Jack Benny and George Burns became friends when both were young performers working their…
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    Leaky Roof

    Mr. Gable had a leak in the roof over his dining room, so he called a repairman to take a…
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    Things Not To Say or Do at a Job Interview

    ** See photo of interviewer's family on desk, point, start laughing uncontrollably.** Ask…
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    Mint Mom

    When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become…
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    Baby Growth

    Our first three babies, all girls, each weighed about seven pounds at birth. When our…

Gravity: Not just a good idea, it's the law!

Gross ignorance: 144 times worse than normal ignorance.

Clock: A small mechanical device to wake up people without children.

Karaoke: A Japanese word meaning "tone deaf".

Opera: Where a guy gets stabbed in the back and sings about it.

Racial prejudice is a pigment of the imagination.

"Normal": A setting on a washing machine.

Health: The slowest possible rate of dying.

Poverty: Having too much month left at the end of the money.

Boy: A noise with dirt on it.

Sleep: That fleeting moment just before the alarm goes off.

Cynic: Someone who smells the flowers and looks for the casket.

Witlag: The delay between delivery and comprehension of a joke.

Skier: Someone who pays an arm and a leg to break them.

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