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  • 50 percent

    Senate Comeback

    A member of the Senate, known for his hot temper and acid tongue, exploded one day in…
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    First Date Nerves

    A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks…
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    Perfectly Made

    When we put our house up for sale, I stressed emphatically that my sons make their beds…
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    Family Cleaning

    Unexpected guests were on the way, and my mother, an impeccable housekeeper, rushed…
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    Cover All Exits!

    During a bank robbery the police chief told the sergeant to cover all exits so the…
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    Are You The Defendant?

    The judge read the charges, then asked, "Are you the defendant in this case?""No sir,…
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    Clergy Crowd Control

    A young clergyman, fresh out of seminary, thought it would help him better understand the…
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    Fair Trial

    A judge enters the courtroom, strikes the gavel and says,"Before I begin this trial, I…
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    Dinosaur Highway

    A goober was taking the tour of a national park not long ago. The ranger mentioned to the…
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    Parrot Strings

    A parrot was in a pet shop with a string attached to each leg when a man walked in…
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    Dad Sayings

    I figured out why they call our language the "Mother Tongue." Fathers never get a chance…
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    Flower Oil

    When I go to a local discount store to get oil and filters for my car, I buy my wife a…
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    A Goober Wins

    A goober goes to a restaurant, buys a coffee a sits down to drink it. He looks on the…
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    Medical Term Needed

    The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he…
Joan decided to redecorate. She wasn't sure how many rolls of wallpaper she would need for the bedroom but she knew that Buffy next door had recently done the same job, and the two apartments were identical in size.

"Buffy," she said, "How many rolls of wallpaper did you buy for your bedroom?"

"Ten," said Buffy.

So Joan bought the ten rolls of paper and did the job, but had 2 rolls left over.

"Buffy," she said, "I bought ten rolls of wallpaper for the bedroom, but I've got 2 left over!"

"Yeah," said Buffy, "So did I."
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