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More Jokes

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    A Great Job

    A guy came home to his wife and said, "Guess what? I've found a great job. A 10 a.m.…
  • school-house

    Beginning School

    Tommy had reached school age. His mother managed with a blast of propaganda to make him…
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    Fast Driver

    My mom has a lead foot, so I was not surprised when a state trooper pulled us over as we…
  • picture of broomstick

    Call Me Leroy

    Uncle Leroy got a job down at the broom factory. On his first day the straw boss (floor…
  • man grumpy

    Hearing Aid

    While talking with my semi-deaf uncle one evening, I noticed that his "hearing aid" was…
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    The Verge

    A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' Mother's name?"One child…
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    Deep Thoughts

    From an actual newspaper contest where entrants ages 4 to 15 were asked to imitate "Deep…
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    Goobers Fishing

    Three goobers are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in…
  • 50 percent

    Senate Comeback

    A member of the Senate, known for his hot temper and acid tongue, exploded one day in…
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    Division Of Brick Labor

    At the construction site of a new church, the contractor stopped to chat with one of his…
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    Little Tim's Goldfish

    Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence.…
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    Talking Dog

    A guy is driving around Wadsworth, Ohio and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking…
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    Get the Picture

    Two weeks after my one-year-old's photo shoot, I returned to the studio to view the…
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    Location Question

    Tiring of the same old buzz cut from the base barber at Fort Dix, New Jersey, I went into…
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    Its On The Way

    A store manager overheard a clerk saying to a customer, "No, ma'am, we haven't had any…

Warning Labels!

7 Up:

Contents under pressure. Cap may blow off causing eye or other serious injury. Point away from face and people, especially when opening.

Vicks Nyquil Gel Caps:

Use of this product in conjunction with alcohol or sedatives may cause drowsiness.

Jonsreds Chainsaw:

Do not attempt to stop chain with hands.

Windex:

Do not spray in eyes.

McDonald's Coffee:

Warning - Contents may be hot.

Bayer Aspirin:

Do not take if allergic to aspirin.

Liquid Plummer:

Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages.

Miller Lite:

Consumption of alcoholic beverages impairs your ability to drive a car or operate machinery, and may cause health problems.

Komatsu Floodlight:

This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark.

Tonyang Lighting Screwdriver:

Use 3 pieces of batteries on 4.

Moet White Star Champagne:

Warning: Remove label before placing in microwave.

Energizer AAA 4 Pack:

If swallowed, promptly see doctor.

Boot's Children’s Cough Medicine:

Do not drive a car or run machinery.

Fritos:

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

Mr. Bubbles:

Keep out of reach of children.

Mark and Spencer's Bread Pudding

Product will be hot after heating.

Craftsman Push Mower

Warning: Do not attempt to remove blade while lawnmower is running or plugged into an outlet.

Sainsbury Peanuts (Read Comments)

Warning: This product contains nuts.

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