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More Jokes

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    Open Mouth, Insert Foot

    At the outpatient surgery center where I work, the anesthesiologist often chatted with…
  • aging-beauty

    Getting Older

    Amy and Jamie are old friends. They have both been married to their husbands for a long…
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    Other Uses for Fruitcake

    1. Paint a few white and place them outside on the grass so people won't park on your…
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    Geese V

    Q: Why is one side of the V geese make always shorter than the other? ........... A:…
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    Bare Bones Moving

    The orthopedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new office, and his staff was helping…
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    Top 7 Signs Your Pastor Needs a Vacation

    Top 7 Signs Your Pastor Needs a Vacation7. His first words to the congregation on Sunday…
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    Three Rules

    One of my husband's duties as a novice drill instructor at Fort Jackson, S.C., was to…
  • train engine

    Express Desire

    A pastor in Central Illinois went to the railroad depot everyday to watch the express…
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    Top Ten Gift Comments

    What do you say when you get a gift you *Really Don't Like*.10. "Well, well, well, now,…
  • Picture of a student pilot

    Tips For Student Pilots

    Tips for student pilots. 1. Takeoffs are optional. Landings are mandatory. 2. If you push…
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    Cursing Parrot

    Jimmy received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown, with a very bad…
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    Votive Candles

    Visiting St Patrick's Cathedral on a tour of New York City, my daughter and her children…
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    Rookies

    A rookie police officer was assigned to ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A…
  • car old

    12 Reasons to Buy a New Car

    1. Your passenger seat is on the National Register of Historic Places.2. Instead of an…
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    Goober Medical Terms

    enign.......................What you be after you be…

Warning Labels!

7 Up:

Contents under pressure. Cap may blow off causing eye or other serious injury. Point away from face and people, especially when opening.

Vicks Nyquil Gel Caps:

Use of this product in conjunction with alcohol or sedatives may cause drowsiness.

Jonsreds Chainsaw:

Do not attempt to stop chain with hands.

Windex:

Do not spray in eyes.

McDonald's Coffee:

Warning - Contents may be hot.

Bayer Aspirin:

Do not take if allergic to aspirin.

Liquid Plummer:

Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages.

Miller Lite:

Consumption of alcoholic beverages impairs your ability to drive a car or operate machinery, and may cause health problems.

Komatsu Floodlight:

This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark.

Tonyang Lighting Screwdriver:

Use 3 pieces of batteries on 4.

Moet White Star Champagne:

Warning: Remove label before placing in microwave.

Energizer AAA 4 Pack:

If swallowed, promptly see doctor.

Boot's Children’s Cough Medicine:

Do not drive a car or run machinery.

Fritos:

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

Mr. Bubbles:

Keep out of reach of children.

Mark and Spencer's Bread Pudding

Product will be hot after heating.

Craftsman Push Mower

Warning: Do not attempt to remove blade while lawnmower is running or plugged into an outlet.

Sainsbury Peanuts (Read Comments)

Warning: This product contains nuts.

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