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    Simple Operation

    A man was seen fleeing down the hall of the hospital just before his operation. "What's…
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    Grandpa's Manners

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    Jury Excuse

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    Dear Dog

    Dear Dog,I am so sorry about you being sent to the dog pound for the broken lamp which…
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    Funeral Music

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    Child Perspective on Retirement

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    Expecting

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    Lazy Cobbler

    A man went into a shoe repair store in his hometown that he had not been in for almost…
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    Kitchen Cry

    Howard came home from work one evening and there was his wife Miriam in the kitchen…
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    Rapid Promotion

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    Ten Commandments

    A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five- and…
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    Camping Hints

    When using a public campground, a tuba placed on your picnic table will keep the…
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    Haircut

    Boss: You got your hair cut on company time.Susie: It grew on company time.Boss: Not all…
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    Dressing The Kids

    The mother of a large family was explaining why she dresses her children alike, right…
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    Tie Conspiracy

    At a clearance sale, the wife of a federal district court judge found a green tie that…

Mother's Day photo frameTop 10 List of what Moms REALLY want...*

10. To be able to eat a whole candy bar (alone) and drink a soda without any "floaties" (ie, backwash)

9. To have my 14 year-old daughter answer a question without rolling her eyes in that "Why is this person my mother?" way.

8. Five pounds of chocolate that won't add twenty.

7. A shower without a child peeking through the curtain with a "Hi Ya Mom!" just as I put a razor to my ankle.

6. A full time cleaning person - period!

5. For my teenager to announce "Hey, Mom! I got a full scholarship and a job all in the same day!"

4. A grocery store that doesn't have candy/gum/cheap toys displayed at the checkout line.

3. To have a family meal without a discussion about bodily secretions.

2. To be able to step on a plane with my toddlers and NOT have someone moan, "Oh no! Why me...!"

And the #1 thing that moms REALLY want is.....

Four words: Fisher Price Play Prison

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