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    Picnic Passions

    A Jewish rabbi and a Catholic priest met at the town's annual 4th of July picnic. Old…
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    Tailing Truck

    A large truck was tailing my son as he drove through town with his girlfriend. The truck…
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    Testimony Night

    It was testimony night in the church. A lady got up and said, "We are living in a wicked…
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    Goober Return

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one here. A goober walks up…
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    Raffle Toy

    Tom had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have…
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    Next Pastor

    Rev. Jones shocked the congregation when he announced his resignation from the church and…
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    Window Savings

    A window salesman phoned a customer. "Hello, Mr. Brown," said the sales rep. "I'm calling…
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    What Is That?

    A young man who left his home in Texas at an early age, finally purchased his own ranch…
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    Haircut Plan

    I was getting my hair cut at a neighborhood shop, and I asked the barber when would be…
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    Ways To Drive A Man Crazy

    ~ Take the batteries out of all the remotes in the house. ~ Organize his workshop,…
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    Card Reader Instructions

    Hard to believe, but many of our customers at the bank still don't know how to swipe…
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    Finding The Cat's Diary

    Day 752 - My captors continue to haunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine…
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    Excerpts From Actual Letters Sent To Landlords

    1. "The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until it is cleared." 2. "This…
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    Cafeteria Sign

    Children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic school for lunch. At the head of…
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    Repeat Position

    A lifeboat was called out to rescue a yacht in trouble. The coastguard, trying to get the…

1.  Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering needed information from his classmates.
(He was caught cheating on a test).

2.  Karen is an endless fund of energy and viability.
(The hyperactive monster can't stay seated for five minutes).

3.  Fantastic imagination!  Unmatched in his capacity for blending fact with fiction.
(He's definitely one of the biggest liars I have ever met).

4.  Margie exhibits a casual, relaxed attitude to school, indicating that high expectations don't intimidate her.
(The lazy thing hasn't done one assignment all term).

5.  Her athletic ability is marvelous.  Superior hand-eye coordination.
(The little creep stung me with a rubber band from 15 feet away).

6.  Nick thrives on interaction with his peers.
(Your son needs to stop socializing and start working).

7.  Your daughter's greatest asset is her demonstrative public discussions.
(Classroom lawyer!  Why is it that every time I explain an assignment she creates a class argument).

8.  John enjoys the thrill of engaging challenges with his peers.
(He's a bully).

9.  An adventurous nature lover who rarely misses opportunities to explore new territory.
(Your daughter was caught skipping school at the fishing pond).

10.  I am amazed at her tenacity in retaining her youthful personality.
(She's so immature that we've run out of diapers).

11.  Unlike some students who hide their emotion, Charles is very expressive and open.
(He must have written the Whiner's Guide).

12.  I firmly believe that her intellectual and emotional progress would be enhanced through a year's repetition of her learning environment.
(Regretfully, we believe that she is not ready for high school and must repeat the 8th grade).

13.  Her exuberant verbosity is awesome!
(A mouth that never stops yakking).

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