More Jokes

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    Ammunition Substantiation

    An infantry brigade was training in the summer heat, learning methods to counter…
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    Hair Mission

    In dire need of a beauty make-over, I went to my salon with a fashion magazine photo of a…
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    Computer Error

    I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Harold, the computer guy, to come…
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    Pet Training

    A rolled up newspaper can be an effective pet training tool when used properly.For…
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    Office Visit

    A middle-aged man walks into a psychologist's office wearing a dancer's tutu, flippers…
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    Kid Comments

    * A kindergarten teacher asked, "What is the shape of the earth ?"One lil' girl spoke up:…
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    Inclusive Poster

    Anxious to include as many minorities, religions and disabilities as possible, the human…
  • gas cap

    Lost Gas Cap

    David filled his car with gas at a self-service gas station. After he had paid and driven…
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    Little Johnny Tested

    The school was having trouble with Little Johnny and decided to have him tested by a…
  • woman desk

    The Importance of Correct Punctuation

    We've all been told how important it is to use correct punctuation. Well, here is a…
  • antique gas pumps

    Looking Funny

    According to statistics, last year over 17 million American families paid a lot of money…
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    Why Parents Go Gray

    The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem…
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    Vet Bills

    While waiting at the veterinarian's office, I overheard two women chatting about their…
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    Things You Do Not Want To Hear In Surgery

    1.) Better save that.? We'll need it for the autopsy.2.) Somebody call the janitor -…
  • airplane trip from Indianapolis to Chicago

    Flight Time

    Unaware that Indianapolis is on Eastern Standard Time and Chicago on Central Standard…

1.  Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering needed information from his classmates.
(He was caught cheating on a test).

2.  Karen is an endless fund of energy and viability.
(The hyperactive monster can't stay seated for five minutes).

3.  Fantastic imagination!  Unmatched in his capacity for blending fact with fiction.
(He's definitely one of the biggest liars I have ever met).

4.  Margie exhibits a casual, relaxed attitude to school, indicating that high expectations don't intimidate her.
(The lazy thing hasn't done one assignment all term).

5.  Her athletic ability is marvelous.  Superior hand-eye coordination.
(The little creep stung me with a rubber band from 15 feet away).

6.  Nick thrives on interaction with his peers.
(Your son needs to stop socializing and start working).

7.  Your daughter's greatest asset is her demonstrative public discussions.
(Classroom lawyer!  Why is it that every time I explain an assignment she creates a class argument).

8.  John enjoys the thrill of engaging challenges with his peers.
(He's a bully).

9.  An adventurous nature lover who rarely misses opportunities to explore new territory.
(Your daughter was caught skipping school at the fishing pond).

10.  I am amazed at her tenacity in retaining her youthful personality.
(She's so immature that we've run out of diapers).

11.  Unlike some students who hide their emotion, Charles is very expressive and open.
(He must have written the Whiner's Guide).

12.  I firmly believe that her intellectual and emotional progress would be enhanced through a year's repetition of her learning environment.
(Regretfully, we believe that she is not ready for high school and must repeat the 8th grade).

13.  Her exuberant verbosity is awesome!
(A mouth that never stops yakking).

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