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More Jokes

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    Typing Test

    A soldier was asked to report to headquarters for assignment. The sergeant said: "We have…
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    Wayward Cessna

    You've all heard of the Air Force's ultra-high security, super-secret base in Nevada,…
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    12 Reasons to be Thankful You Burned the Turkey

    1. Salmonella won't be a concern. 2. Everyone will think your turkey is Cajun blackened.…
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    Thunderstorm Plea

    An airliner flew into a violent thunderstorm and was soon swaying and bumping around the…
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    Scientist's Convention

    In the far distant future in the year 4527, a number of scientists from all over the…
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    Men and Women

    Differences Between Men & Women NICKNAMES: If Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle go out…
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    Turn Around

    A local priest and pastor were fishing on the side of the road.They thoughtfully made a…
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    Memory School

    Two elderly gentlemen are playing cards on Saturday evening as they have done for the…
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    Get Moving

    While driving with my granddaughter, I was getting annoyed with the driver ahead of me…
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    Overworked

    For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my…
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    Divy It Up

    Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her…
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    50th Anniversary

    At my grandparents 50th wedding anniversary, I was looking through a photo album of their…
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    Dish Shopping

    When visiting her family in Los Angeles, a woman decided to explore a trendy shopping…
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    Computer Support Woes

    Actual dialog of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee: *Note the word 'former'…
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    Perfectly Made

    When we put our house up for sale, I stressed emphatically that my sons make their beds…

1.  Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering needed information from his classmates.
(He was caught cheating on a test).

2.  Karen is an endless fund of energy and viability.
(The hyperactive monster can't stay seated for five minutes).

3.  Fantastic imagination!  Unmatched in his capacity for blending fact with fiction.
(He's definitely one of the biggest liars I have ever met).

4.  Margie exhibits a casual, relaxed attitude to school, indicating that high expectations don't intimidate her.
(The lazy thing hasn't done one assignment all term).

5.  Her athletic ability is marvelous.  Superior hand-eye coordination.
(The little creep stung me with a rubber band from 15 feet away).

6.  Nick thrives on interaction with his peers.
(Your son needs to stop socializing and start working).

7.  Your daughter's greatest asset is her demonstrative public discussions.
(Classroom lawyer!  Why is it that every time I explain an assignment she creates a class argument).

8.  John enjoys the thrill of engaging challenges with his peers.
(He's a bully).

9.  An adventurous nature lover who rarely misses opportunities to explore new territory.
(Your daughter was caught skipping school at the fishing pond).

10.  I am amazed at her tenacity in retaining her youthful personality.
(She's so immature that we've run out of diapers).

11.  Unlike some students who hide their emotion, Charles is very expressive and open.
(He must have written the Whiner's Guide).

12.  I firmly believe that her intellectual and emotional progress would be enhanced through a year's repetition of her learning environment.
(Regretfully, we believe that she is not ready for high school and must repeat the 8th grade).

13.  Her exuberant verbosity is awesome!
(A mouth that never stops yakking).

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