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  • vaccum cleaner_hose

    Vacuum Manure

    A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a…
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    Best Guide

    I understand the fix a local hunting guide got himself into.His party became hopelessly…
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    Bus Pole

    While riding the bus, my mother noticed a young man, who was holding onto the same pole,…
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    Understanding the Metric System

    1 million microphones = 1 megaphone1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles2000 mockingbirds = 2…
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    Skipping School

    The local high school has a policy that the parent's must call the school if the student…
  • preacher

    Forgive Your Enemies

    The preacher, in his Sunday sermon, used "Forgive Your Enemies" as his subject. After a…
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    Lion Tamer

    A man told the ringmaster that he was interested in joining the circus as a lion tamer.…
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    Taste It

    One afternoon a waiter served a bowl of chicken soup to an elderly gentleman. As he…
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    Two Teas

    1st customer: . . . I'll have tea.2nd customer: . . . Me, too. And be sure the glass is…
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    Think You're Having A Bad Day?

    So you think you're having a bad day. A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio…
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    Warning Sign

    Vacationing in Alaska, I couldn't help but notice all the warnings about bears posted in…
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    One Per Point

    One day a professor was giving a big test to his students. He handed out all of the tests…
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    Suggestion Box

    The strict and unsmiling manager noticed that the suggestion box was missing from the…
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    Cake Baking for Mom's of Small Children

    Cake Baking for Mom's of Small Children Preheat oven, get out utensils and ingredients.…
  • bathroom sink

    Bathroom Sign

    Thanks to Norma K. Appel for sending today's CleanLaugh. Dear Pastor Tim, this is a true…

*Why Dogs Can't Use Computers*

10. He's distracted by cats chasing his mouse.

9. SIT and STAY were hard enough; CUT and PASTE are out of the question.

8. Saliva-coated floppy disks refuse to work.

7. Three words: carpal paw syndrome.

6. Involuntary tail wagging is a dead give-away that he's browsing www.purina.com instead of working.

5. The fire hydrant icon is simply too frustrating.

4. He can't help attacking the screen when he hears "You've Got Mail."

3. It's too messy to "mark" every Web site he visits.

2. The FETCH command isn't available on all platforms.

1. He can't stick his head out of Windows XP.

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