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  • college Mount Union College Ohio

    Daughter In College

    Did you hear about the banker who was recently arrested for embezzling $100,000 to pay…
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    Chow

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    Happy Birthday Grandpa

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    Empty Nest Craft

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    Computer Support Woes

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    Van Gogh Family Tree

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    Cooking Terms

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    Fearless Leader

    As a professor at Texas A & M, I taught during the day and did research at night. I would…
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    The Haircut

    A young man had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister,…
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    Jar 47

    A new doctor had arrived in town. He could cure anything and anybody. Everyone was amazed…
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    New Convert Help

    He was not well-educated and rather rough and crude around the edges, but he was recently…
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    Pupil's Question

    A young pupil asked, "Master, what is fate.""Ah, my son, it is what has brought great…
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    Wake Up Call

    One night at an economy motel, I ordered a 6 a.m. wake-up call. The next morning, I awoke…
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    Soft Seven

    A young man is paired up with a priest on the first hole at the golf course. When they…
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    Medical Fraud

    The police recently busted a man selling 'secret formula' tablets he claimed gave eternal…

picture of a white haired ladyThese are reported to be actual test answers from various schools in the Huntsville, Alabama metropolitan area:

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: What is a planet?
A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.

Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.

Q; Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized?
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section."
A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.

Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.

Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport.

Q: Use the word "judicious" in a sentence to show you understand its meaning.
A: Hands that judicious can be soft as your face.

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab wears on his head.

Q: What is a Hindu?
A: It lays eggs.

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