More Jokes

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    New Friend Sincerity

    Last summer my wife and I met a couple at a restaurant. After lunch, the women decided to…
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    Disguising Presents

    Three-year-old Elizabeth was helping her mother Melinda wrap a present for her father.…
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    Message Break

    A pastor, known for his lengthy sermons, noticed a man get up and leave during the middle…
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    Sorry I'm Late Mom

    Late one Saturday evening, I was awakened by the ringing of my phone. In a sleepy grumpy…
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    Board Meeting

    After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church…
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    Vet Visit

    In his younger days our golden retriever Catcher often ran away when he had the chance.…
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    Card Reader

    "Can people predict the future with cards?" Jessica asked Danny."My mother can," Danny…
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    Honeymoon In England

    On a visit to my wife's native England for our honeymoon, we arrived at London's Gatwick…
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    Lost in the Woods

    Two hunters got lost in the woods. The first hunter said, "Don't worry. All we have to do…
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    Priest Twin

    Our priest suddenly became ill and asked his twin brother, also a priest, to fill in for…
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    Goober Coffee Maker

    The newlywed Goober went to the store to ask how to operate the new coffeemaker received…
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    Quotes From 11 Year-Olds' Science Exams

    The following are all quotes from 11 year-olds' science exams:"Water is composed of two…
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    TV Quote

    Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one…
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    Dog Calls

    Bernard, who is noted for his gracious manners, was awakened one morning at four forty…
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    Audi Alteram Parten

    During a Law course class, the 'Audi Alteram Parten' rule was explained. Translated it…

wise owl*Words and Questions From the "Wise"*

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Energizer Bunny arrested; charged with battery.

I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

I used to have an open mind, but my brains kept falling out.

Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.

How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

Laughing stock: Cattle with a sense of humor.

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.

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