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More Jokes

  • pictures of solar eclipse

    Eclipse Memos

    Memo from Director General to Manager: Today at 11 o'clock there will be a total eclipse…
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    Mommy Test

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    The Congregation Replied

    Down in the south, there are many churches known as "answer back" churches. When the…
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    Sermon Interpretation

    One Sunday after church Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about. Her…
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    Heavenly Music

    I attend a small village church in rural PA. On any given Sunday, we may have six or…
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    Signs You are Broke

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  • phone2

    Mike's Girlfriend

    After directory assistance gave me my boyfriend's new telephone number, I dialed him --…
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    Tourism Promotion

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    Doctor News

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    First I Got

    Elmer says, "First, I got tonsillitis, followed by appendicitis and pneumonia. After that…
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    Computer T-Shirt Slogans - #1

    Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.As a computer, I find your faith in technology…
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    Mess Cake

    The Chaplain had been assigned to the ship and he noticed how much grief the cooks (Mess…
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    Service

    A woman walked up to the manager of a department store."Are you hiring any help?" she…
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    If You Go, I'll Go

    A church had a man in the choir who couldn't sing. Several people hinted to him that he…
  • public speaking

    PTA Speakers

    As a traffic safety consultant, I often gave talks to organizations on accident…

railway tracks

Benny wanted a job as a signalman on the railways.

At his interview, the inspector asked him this question:

"What would you do if you saw 2 trains heading for each other on the SAME track?

Benny replied," I would switch the points for one of the trains."

"Good. But what if the lever broke?", asked the inspector.

"Then I'd run down to the signal box", said Benny, "and use the manual lever there."

"What if lightning struck it?' asked the inspector.

"Then..." Benny continued, "I'd run back into signal box & phone the next signal box."

"What if the phone was engaged?"

"Well.....in that case," persevered Benny, " I'd rush down out of the box & use the public emergency phone at the level crossing up there..."

"What would you do if THAT was vandalized?"

"Oh, well then I'd run into the village & get my Uncle Toby."

This bizarre response puzzled the Inspector, so he asked, "And just why would you do that??"

"Because Uncle Toby... He's never seen a train wreck!!"

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