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    Alllleee-oop!

    A champion jockey is about to enter an important race on a new horse. The horse's trainer…
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    Plane Pontoons

    Tiring of the inconvenience of the drive from airport to country cottage, a man equipped…
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    Window Savings

    A window salesman phoned a customer. "Hello, Mr. Brown," said the sales rep. "I'm calling…
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    Listening In

    A long time ago, before the days of cell phones, I needed to call home, and the only pay…
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    Dish Shopping

    When visiting her family in Los Angeles, a woman decided to explore a trendy shopping…
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    Typo Apology

    "We apologize for the error in the last edition, in which we stated that 'Mr Fred Nicolme…
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    Taxing Sleeps

    A couple of weeks after hearing a sermon on Psalms 51:2-4 (knowing my own hidden secrets)…
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    Science Fair Responses

    Responses to questions on 5th and 6th grade science tests:- There are 26 vitamins in all,…
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    The Head Hog

    The secretary picked up the phone and heard a very "countryfied" voice on the other end…
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    Sore Mover

    Co-workers sympathized as my mother complained that her back was really sore from moving…
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    Dinosaur Bones

    Some tourists in the Chicago Museum of Natural History are marveling at the dinosaur…
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    Color Blind

    Checking out of the grocery store, I noticed that the bag boy was eyeing my two adopted…
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    In A Few Moments

    So far today, Lord, I've done all right; I haven't gossiped, haven't lost my temper,…
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    Comprehending Engineers

    Take One A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly…
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    911 Sees All

    Part of my job as a 911 dispatcher is to interrogate callers who are in various states of…
A man goes into an ice cream parlor and says, "I'd like two scoops of chocolate ice cream, please."

The girl behind the counter says, "I'm very sorry, sir, but our delivery truck broke down this morning.  We're out of chocolate,"

"In that case," the man says, "I'll have two scoops of chocolate ice cream."

"You don't understand, sir," the girl says.  "We have no chocolate."

"Then just give me some chocolate," he says.

Getting angrier by the second, the girl says, "Sir, will you spell VAN, as in vanilla?"

The man says, "V-A-N."

"Now spell STRAW, as in strawberry."

"OK.  S-T-R-A-W."

"Now," the girl says, "spell STINK, as in chocolate."

The man hesitates.  Then he says.  "There is no stink in chocolate."

"THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU!" she screams.
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