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More Jokes

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    Wire Guard

    Gale-force winds and frigid temperatures had taken their toll. Snapped electric wires…
  • snowman

    Learned From a Snowman

    "All I Need to Know about Life I Learned From a Snowman.... " --It's okay if you're a…
  • baseball1

    Do You Understand?

    At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you…
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    Positive Start

    How to start your day with a positive outlook.1. Open a new file in your PC.2. Name it…
  • doctor4

    Baby Prescription

    A woman brought her baby in to see the doctor, and he determined right away the baby had…
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    Men's Thesaurus

    "IT'S A GUY THING"Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it,…
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    Arrangements

    It was a difficult subject to bring before his aged mother, but John felt that he must:…
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    Major League Snacks

    I took my son to his first Major League baseball game when he was four. The game was…
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    Gripe Comments

    After every flight, pilots fill out a form (called a "gripe sheet," at some airlines)…
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    Burning Call

    A screenwriter comes home to a burned down house. His sobbing and slightly-singed wife is…
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    Gracie Allen's Classic Recipe for Turkey

    Gracie Allen's Classic Recipe for Turkey: Ingedients: - 1 large turkey - 1 small turkey…
  • judges gavel

    Duelling Judges

    Tyler and Katz, two judges, were each arrested on speeding charges. When they arrived in…
  • picture of a hang glider

    Zeek's Hang Glider

    In the back woods of Gooberland, you don't see too many people hang-gliding. Ol' Zeek,…
  • eye examiner

    Eye Test Chart

    When his eyes began to give him trouble, a man went to a ophthalmologist in Prague. The…
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    Rice Preference

    The young woman really thought she'd been very patient, through a protracted period of…

Picture of a chef with thumb downYou are a lousy cook if....

Your family automatically heads for the table every time they hear a fire siren.

Anyone has ever broken a tooth eating your homemade yoghurt.

Your kids know what "peas porridge in a pot nine days old" tastes like.

Your son goes outside to make mud pies, the rest of the family grabs forks and follows him.

Your kids' favorite drink is Alka-Seltzer.

You have to buy 25 pounds of dog food twice a week for your toy poodle.

Your kids got even with the neighborhood bully by inviting him over for dinner.

Your husband refers to the smoke detector as the oven timer.

No matter what you do to it the gravy still turns bright purple.

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