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More Jokes

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    Vow Changes

    Ken and Melba had finished their breakfast at the retirement home and were relaxing in…
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    Station Help

    An elderly man was standing in front of the ticket office in Grand Central Station. A…
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    A Dog's Diary

    5:30am: Started the day as a hero! When the sound of the newspaper hitting the driveway…
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    Bunyan Fall

    My son, Bunyan, is a construction foreman. One day he tumbled from a scaffold, managing…
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    Winter House

    We purchased an old home in Northern New York State from two elderly sisters. Winter was…
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    Sunday Funnies

    One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was "acting up" during the morning worship…
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    Lazy Cobbler

    A man went into a shoe repair store in his hometown that he had not been in for almost…
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    Goober Baby News

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    I Always Wondered About That

    During a summer break from my studies at an engineering university, I worked in a scrap…
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    Goober in Snow Storm

    A goober got lost in her car in a New England snow storm. She remembered what her dad had…
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    Kid Say

    The best laughs I have known in life have been from my own children. I have captured…
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    Amateur Paleontologist

    Paleoanthropology Division Smithsonian Institute 207 Pennsylvania Avenue Washington, DC…
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    Thoughtful Sidney

    Sometime after Sidney died, his widow, Tillie, was finally able to speak about what a…
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    Happy Birthday Line

    Because of a minor infraction, a shipmate of mine aboard the USS Reeves, bound for Japan,…
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    Eclipse Memos

    Memo from Director General to Manager: Today at 11 o'clock there will be a total eclipse…

You Know It's Hot Outside When...

**you ask your boss for extra work so you can be in the air conditioning as much as possible

** you've been getting hot flashes, and you're a man

** the swans in the park come in "original recipe" and "extra tasty crispy"

** the strawberries are ripe, and the cab drivers are even riper

** your pool water starts to boil in the sun

** the hot-dogs sold outside Yankee Stadium are actually hot

** pigs complain about sweating like fat humans

** a scalding hot shower still cools you down

** people walking down the sidewalk spontaneously burst into flames

** a $20 surcharge is added to your bill when you eat at air-conditioned restaurants

** the politicians take their hands out of your pockets to fan themselves

** you need a spatula to remove your clothing

** you wish you had gotten the cloth seats instead of leather

** you are sweating in both directions -- up and down!

** you are sitting inside reading these jokes

** your brother's braces make blisters on his lips

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