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More Jokes

  • preacher1

    Long Sermon Feedback

    After a very long and boring sermon the parishioners filed out of the church saying…
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    If You Love Someone

    Pessimist: If you love someone, Set her free ... if she ever comes back, she's yours, If…
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    Bathroom Instructions

    On the first day of school, the Kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone has to go to the…
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    Perspective

    An English professor wrote the words, "a woman without her man is nothing" on the…
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    Great Cheese

    The customer in the Italian restaurant was so pleased with his meal that he asked to…
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    Minivan Tow

    A man was driving down the highway late one night when his mini-van broke down. He turned…
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    Shovel Need

    One morning a local highway department crew reaches their job-site and realizes they have…
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    Overheard At The Cemetery

    These two boys filled up a bucket of nuts and sat down by the tree. Out of sight, they…
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    Chapstick

    We had this great 10 year old cat named Jack who just recently died.Jack was a great cat…
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    Steeple Paint

    The church steeple in Port Gibson is very high, and was being painted on a rather hot…
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    Good Singer

    In a Brooklyn upscale pet shop, an elderly woman burst into the store. "I want to buy a…
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    College Laundry

    My son Mark was only 5 feet, 8 inches tall when he left for college in the fall. He…
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    Cover All Exits!

    During a bank robbery the police chief told the sergeant to cover all exits so the…
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    Unwritten Warning Labels

    *Unwritten Warning Labels*On a cardboard windshield sun shade: "Warning: Do Not Drive…
  • An historic tour company dressed their employees in colonial dress.

    Colonial Break

    A company offered tours through the historic district, led by guides dressed in Colonial…

You Know It's Hot Outside When...

**you ask your boss for extra work so you can be in the air conditioning as much as possible

** you've been getting hot flashes, and you're a man

** the swans in the park come in "original recipe" and "extra tasty crispy"

** the strawberries are ripe, and the cab drivers are even riper

** your pool water starts to boil in the sun

** the hot-dogs sold outside Yankee Stadium are actually hot

** pigs complain about sweating like fat humans

** a scalding hot shower still cools you down

** people walking down the sidewalk spontaneously burst into flames

** a $20 surcharge is added to your bill when you eat at air-conditioned restaurants

** the politicians take their hands out of your pockets to fan themselves

** you need a spatula to remove your clothing

** you wish you had gotten the cloth seats instead of leather

** you are sweating in both directions -- up and down!

** you are sitting inside reading these jokes

** your brother's braces make blisters on his lips

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