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More Jokes

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    Need a Pen?

    A patient at the dental office where I was a receptionist stopped by my desk to pay her…
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    Be Careful Following the Crowd

    Another true life story for the Funnies... A new missionary recruit went to Venezuela for…
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    Grandpa Cut Up

    Many years ago, a grandfather bought a hobby horse by mail order as a birthday present…
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    Running Away

    A man scolded his son for being so unruly and the child rebelled against his father. He…
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    Good Old Days

    Grandpa was always going on about the good old days, and the lower cost of living, in…
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    Elf Pet Peeves

    ~ Ever since they hit the big time, those Keebler Elves act like we don't exist.~ Santa…
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    Modern Tool Reality

    Hammer - In ancient times a hammer was used to inflict pain on one's enemies. Modern…
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    Goober Airlines

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:…
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    Cure For Lateness

    Bob had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work.…
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    Seatmate Choice

    The plane was only half-full. When an attractive young woman asked if the seat next to…
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    Picnic Passions

    A Jewish rabbi and a Catholic priest met at the town's annual 4th of July picnic. Old…
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    September 11 Update

    Dear Cybersalt.org List Members, All Cybersalt.org lists will continue to be silent…
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    Good Evening, Ladies and Gentlemen

    A friend was lecturing in Latin America. He was going to use a translator, but to…
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    Science Quotes from Kids - Part 1

    ~ One horsepower is the amount of energy it takes to drag a horse 500 feet in one…
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    Misbehaving Phone Call

    Seven year old Johnny had finished his summer vacation and gone back to school.Two days…

1. You find yourself beginning to like accordion music.

2. You're sitting on a park bench and a Boy Scout comes up and helps you cross your legs.

3. Lawn care has become a big highlight of your life.

4. You tune into the easy listening station...on purpose.

5. You discover that your measurements are now small, medium and large...In that order.

6. You light the candles on your birthday cake and a group of campers form a circle and start singing Kumbaya.

7. You keep repeating yourself.

8. You start video taping daytime game shows.

9. At the airport, they ask to check your bags...and you're not carrying any luggage.

10. You wonder why you waited so long to take up macrame.

11. Your Insurance Company has started sending you their free calendar...a month at a time.

12. At cafeterias, you complain that the gelatin is too tough.

13. Your new easy chair has more options than your car.

14. When you do the "Hokey Pokey" you put your left hip out...and it stays out.

15. One of the throw pillows on your bed is a hot water bottle.

16. Conversations with people your own age often turn into "dueling ailments."

17. You keep repeating yourself.

18. It takes a couple of tries to get over a speed bump.

19. You discover the words, "whippersnapper," "scalawag" and "by-cracky" creeping into your vocabulary.

20. You're on a TV game show and you decide to risk it all and go for the rocker.

21. You begin every other sentence with, "Nowadays..."

22. You run out of breath walking DOWN a flight of stairs.

23. You look both ways before crossing a room.

24. Your social security number only has three digit s.

25. You keep repeating yourself.

26. You come to the conclusion that your worst enemy is gravity.

27. You go to a Garden Party and you're mainly interested in the garden.

28. You find your mouth making promises your body can't keep.

29. The waiter asks how you'd like your steak...and you say "pureed."

30. At parties you attend, "regularity" is considered the topic of choice.

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