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    Toaster Oven

    One of my daughter's wedding presents was a toaster oven. Soon after the honeymoon, she…
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    Punishment Withheld

    Teacher: " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also…
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    Elderly Couple Sharing

    A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at McDonald's. He noticed that…
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    Waiting For A Table

    When my husband and I showed up at a very popular restaurant, it was crowded. I went up…
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    Black Snake

    It was the first camping experience for Jed.As soon as he had pitched his tent, he went…
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    Chess Playing Dog

    A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. He…
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    Robber Visit

    A man was sleeping soundly when his wife shook him and said, "Wake up, someone is…
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    Last Minute Suggestions

    Automotive Gift Suggestions - Just in Time for Last Minute Christmas ShoppingIf you have…
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    Knee Tattoo

    A hospital corpsman and I were getting an elderly retired master chief petty officer out…
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    Scientist's Convention

    In the far distant future in the year 4527, a number of scientists from all over the…
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    Daaaad!

    A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later:"Da-ad...""What?""I'm…
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    You Know It's Hot Outside When…

    You Know It's Hot Outside When...**you ask your boss for extra work so you can be in the…
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    Rookies

    A rookie police officer was assigned to ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A…
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    Carried Away Shopping

    In a shop, two men struck up a conversation. Just as one fellow said that his wife was…
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    Morning Kiss

    A farmer and his wife had just awakened one morning to the crowing of their rooster.…

* You know vector calculus but you can't remember how to do long division.

* You chuckle whenever anyone says "centrifugal force."

* You've actually used every single function on your graphing calculator.

* It is sunny and 70 degrees outside, and you are working on a computer.

* You frequently whistle the theme song to "MacGyver."

* You have a pet named after a scientist.

* You laugh at jokes about mathematicians.

* You can translate English into Binary.

* You can't remember what's behind the door at the lab that says "Exit."

* You avoid doing anything because you don't want to contribute to the eventual heat-death of the universe.

* You consider ANY non-engineering course "easy."

* When your professor asks you where your homework is, you claim to have accidentally determined its momentum so precisely that, according to Heisenberg, it could be anywhere in the universe.

* You'll assume that a "horse" is a "sphere" in order to make the math easier.

* The blinking 12:00 on someone's VCR draws you in like a tractor beam to fix it.

* The salesperson at Circuit City can't answer any of your questions.

* You can't help eavesdropping in computer stores... and correcting the salesperson.

* You go on the rides at Disneyland and sit backwards to see how they do the special effects.

* You have a habit of destroying things in order to see how they work.

* You've even calculated how much you make per second.

* Your favorite James Bond character is "Q".

* You understood more than five of these jokes.

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