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More Jokes

  • bank

    Balance

    I'm not saying that the customer service in my bank is bad, but when I went in the other…
  • plane passenger window

    On Time

    The passengers were leaving the plane after landing, and one smiling, satisfied passenger…
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    Possessed Computer?

    For a computer programming class, I sat directly across from someone, and our computers…
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    Burglary

    The detective was interviewing the man whose clothing shop had just been burglarized.…
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    Education At Work

    "What's the usual tip?" a man growled when, Jason, a college student delivered his pizza.…
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    Successful Ice Fishing

    Two men have been sitting out on a lake all day long ice fishing. One has been having no…
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    Next Question

    In my sociology class, we were instructed to write down answers to some questions the…
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    Before and After Children

    *Before and After Children*BEFORE Children: I was thankful for the opportunity to…
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    Y1K

    Canterbury, England. AD 999. An atmosphere close to panic prevails today throughout…
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    One Rifle Hunting

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Narrow Escape Responses

    There was an engineer, manager, and a programmer driving down a steep mountain road. The…
  • factory

    20 Like You

    A factory owner said to a store owner, "Thank you, Mr. Smith, for your patronage. I wish…
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    Puppy Power

    Officer Roland, near the end of his shift, noticed a woman driving a small pickup truck…
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    $100 Coffee

    A street person approached a passer-by and said, "Sir, would you give me $100 for a cup…
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    Memory School

    Two elderly gentlemen are playing cards on Saturday evening as they have done for the…

* You know vector calculus but you can't remember how to do long division.

* You chuckle whenever anyone says "centrifugal force."

* You've actually used every single function on your graphing calculator.

* It is sunny and 70 degrees outside, and you are working on a computer.

* You frequently whistle the theme song to "MacGyver."

* You have a pet named after a scientist.

* You laugh at jokes about mathematicians.

* You can translate English into Binary.

* You can't remember what's behind the door at the lab that says "Exit."

* You avoid doing anything because you don't want to contribute to the eventual heat-death of the universe.

* You consider ANY non-engineering course "easy."

* When your professor asks you where your homework is, you claim to have accidentally determined its momentum so precisely that, according to Heisenberg, it could be anywhere in the universe.

* You'll assume that a "horse" is a "sphere" in order to make the math easier.

* The blinking 12:00 on someone's VCR draws you in like a tractor beam to fix it.

* The salesperson at Circuit City can't answer any of your questions.

* You can't help eavesdropping in computer stores... and correcting the salesperson.

* You go on the rides at Disneyland and sit backwards to see how they do the special effects.

* You have a habit of destroying things in order to see how they work.

* You've even calculated how much you make per second.

* Your favorite James Bond character is "Q".

* You understood more than five of these jokes.

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