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Cartoons

Senior Citizen Easy Rider

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Published: 23 March 2013

This christian bible cartoon features a senior citizen as Easy Rider
Last Updated: 05 December 2014

Dating

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Published: 23 March 2013


Unless you are part of an arranged marriage, .. DATING is the recognized 'process' of finding Mr or Mrs Right in our culture.

I believe the top 5 factors to consider in dating are 1. Looks, 2. sense of humor, 3. personality, 4. family, and 5. money All these and more are reasons we choose to date.. and maybe eventually marry.


WHERE TO LOOK FOR LOVE, AND WHAT TO SAY?


"What's your major?" is a classic breaking the ice lines for the college crowd, but in the Back Pew we are ike E-Harmony with an added spiritual dimension.

We don't look for a future spouse in a singles bar, but more likely at a Church Potluck with pick up lines like.. "If I said you have a Beautiful Spirit would you hold it against me?". 


Or maybe Mr. Right, or that Woman (or women?) of your dreams you will meet at a Bible Study, Babes in Christ, and Fishers of Men fo-sho.

But while we may be more spiritual in the Back Pew, we still find looks are important and support the time honored scale of tenmethod in measuring looks.



Dating is NOT a bed of roses!


but instead there comes a time when you realize.. he or she is not perfect resulting in awkward moments and harsh words. You may even find out fromlittle birds that besides not being the right guy, he is simply a jerk.

The Next important part of dating is The KISS..

While we have all heard about the dangers of kiss and tell, well I would like to say kiss & click is not the proper focus for a tender moment such as a kiss.


The anxious anticipation of the first kiss is common, where sometimes advances are welcomed in the 'lip arena' while other times.. we find REJECTION. 

So I recommend being a bit coy in that first move.. maybe even bring scripture into your lip offering with the ol' greet each other with a HOLY KISS move. 

In the end, rest assured she will be drawn to you because you are a manly man!

 

If this fails there is always Christmas where under the power of the MISTLETOE two may be drawn to that first kiss.

Of course there is so much more to dating. We have the movies, the popcorn, the romantic picnic dates on sunny summer days, and so much more... but .. I am a cartoonist.. if you want sappy romantic sentiments GET A HALLMARK CARD... but if you want a chuckle at the romance dance we call dating, then THE BACK PEW might be the place to go before you Say I DO, or at least say maybe

Last Updated: 05 December 2014
  • Bible Cartoons

Food

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Published: 23 March 2013

food title

Fasting
- A Fasting Alternative
- Flee From Fridge
- Fast or Diet, Sad Face, 
- Unshaven? 
- Not by bread alone 
- The Communion Diet? 
- Sacralicious? 

Potlucks
- The Drool Rule
- Just like NASCAR
- Eternity and Potlucks
- The Messiah Factor
- Saved by Grace
- Potlucks are my 'gift'
- and don't forget dessert.
- 
direct SAMPLING 
- 
POTLUCK body of Christ? 


Spiritual Food 

- Hungry for God's Word
- Spoon Fed Christians 
- Krispy Kreme Power?
- Got Milk? 
- Body is a TEMPLE 
- Authentic Tex Mex?

COFFEE <-- where I keep 
all the caffinated christians. 

BIBLE DIETS
Old Testament...

- Don't eat kites,
bats, or rats ..
like anyone should have to
tell us that!
- One of those roadside
Leviticus Cafes 
- Baking UNEVEN bread?


New Testament ...
- gagging on gnats
- swallowing camels 
- JBs Honey & Locusts 
- scrambled scorpions?
- snake or fish
- fasting for Paul? 
- bread & carbs?
- pizza & wings feast 
- Acts II Hot Sauce

ETERNITY DIETS
- Devilsfood Cake in Heaven
- Angelsfood Cake in Hell 

COLOR flee from sin (food).jpg (59093 bytes)dieting_or_fasting.jpg (80702 bytes)

COLOR bodyisatemple.jpg (85467 bytes)


 

Last Updated: 05 December 2014
  • Bible Cartoons

Pew People

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Published: 23 March 2013

pewpeople title

Church.. it does a body good!

Sundays begins by leaving the morning paper behind, load up the family truckster with the FAM.. and begin that Time honored DRIVE to church. You can already sense God's spirit moving. 

It is truly the gathering of the saints and the aints and our congregation is more colorful than any box of shiny new crayons. 

And just because I am from Minnesota does not mean I don't know what DIVERSITY is. We worship with both Norwegians and Swedes.

My Church is that place to fellowship with friends, without any church club handshake.


We greet visitors with the love of God on our faces in in our hearts and NOT with lofty disapproving glances from any high and mighty illusion of our own righteousness. 
We don't claim to be perfect, and though 
there are a few wound too tight. with misguided intentions .. We are good folk.. 

Fellowship is important
, and my church is where the Spirit and Coffee both flow, but with the coffee flowing freely, there are risks.

Church is a place to be real because of God's grace.. BUT we sometimes instead choose to hide behind a Churcy Facade and ormask. .. and there are those BOBBLEHEADS. 
   


and it is important to note, my church is in Minnesota and until the state deals with the border problem, they will deal with..

cheeseheads for Jesus in their own way. 


My church is a comfortable place
 where ASLEEP IN CHRIST or as we call them 'Eutychus Moments' describes more than a few in the congregation. For a few cases we have used 'extreme exhortations' to encourage participation for a 90 minute service.


We are also 'blessed' with a few regular attenders that you would have to describe their faith as having a 'glorious absence of sophistication'. Growing up in rural Wisconsin I can relate and embrace what some may title as 'REDNECK' Believers - We don't handle NO SNAKES but that whole dress flannel shirt with a tie look I find appealing attire for Sunday mornings 12 months of the year.. thank you very much.

Along with the above mentioned high-tech 'keep a brother from sleeping' device, I must share we are high tech when it comes to tracking attendance and giving 

though some of the bretheren thought using a 'wand' to read bar codes was a bit Harry Potterish commenting this was clearly of the devil..

We are called to be a Holy People, though some are also holey. where not only our faith is contagious, but both our ushers and congregation have shared 'things' besides Jesus.

Our church is a house of Worship. Feel free to lift up holy hands to the Lord, or sit on your ample butt. Music ranges from traditional organ music to body surfing in the moshpit, . We even have a safe place for those of you who are worship impaired.

If you have kids.. we have a ready, and (mostly) willling Kids Ministry staff to love and care for your children so they do not have to sit in the church service with you.

Senior Citizens are welcome.. appreciated, respected, and assisted AGAIN by the wonder of technology.. can you hear me now?.. what?

We are a growing church in more ways than out waistline,
 and take serious the challenge of Overcrowding and traffic flow by the unconventional crowd control techniques of 
Leap Frog, Hell's Angels , and Body Surfing.

We offer Workshops , membership classes, and participate in Church Unity conferences all with the goal of building a better Church body that is LOOKIN' GOOD , well read, enthusiastic, and sensitive to hear A WORD? from God.. or Bob? 


There are a number of great Women's Ministry opportunities. The Bible Study is the ENVY of the men, and the MOPS group is a great resource for mothers of preschoolers and NOT to be confused with theMOPSters at that church down the road.

Please realize we will be worshiping and praising God for a full 90 minutes each Sunday and we don't want to be catching any of your mind's wandering, or participating in the age old church clock watching sin.

And finally a statement about church. We appreciate the commitment of those in our church knowing our church is made up of good people and we are a family, BUT just like in every family we do not always get along perfectly, BUT just like a family our love and commitment to each other and the God we serve will not be shaken.

Note: Rest assured though some were pushing for it, there will be NO STONINGSin the Town Square for those caught sleeping in church.

 

Last Updated: 05 December 2014
  • Bible Cartoons

Pastors

Details
Published: 23 March 2013

preacher title

Letters to Pastor: 1. Dear Pastor.. 2. Halo On Too Tight!! 3. Good Preachers Gone Bad??

PREACH IT (sermonizing)
- Grumpy Altar Calls
- The 'You Better Watch Out' sermon 

COLOR responsivemumbling.jpg (59848 bytes)COLOR now i lay me down to sleep.jpg (85372 bytes)
- Responsive Mumbling - Now I lay me down to sleep?
- The Bible Expositor - Zip it pastor
- Sermon of IRONY - God the Father v. Godfather?
- Fiend 
Day - Spiritual Giants - Praying for Jesse V 
- Steroid
 enhanced sermons?
- Gone 
Fishing - Going Fishing
- EULOGY
 gone bad - Silence of the Lambs?
- Auctioneer Altar Calls 

- Semons and other jokes - assessments?
 

STYLE POINTS
- FULL OF
.. something - Pastorcize - GLORY preacher
- 
Preachin BOLD & LOUD - Father
 O'Dreary
COLOR pastorcize.jpg (84516 bytes)

DON'T MINCE WORDS 
- Popped a button - 55 not 56!
- Burn CDs and BURN !- Poser Pastors
- Sermons that'll make your Uterus drop!

PREACHING OUTSIDE THE BOX
- Better Cheddar sermons
- Preachin with HAT ON? - Cyber Pastors
- You want the TRUTH? - Ex Mobster
- The Purpose Driven Poultry Preacher
- Hell Fire Sermons by SNOWMEN 
- The Preacher Creature 
- The Sulking Bear

 

PASTOR TOUGH GUYS
- Eternal Security giving - Malitia Ministers - BikerPreacher - Popeye the Preacher Man - Biker Believer
COLOR harley preacher.jpg (65185 bytes)

PASTORAL CANDIDATES
- 
Yes, I see that hand - Telling jokes
 

A PIECE OF YOUR MIND
Hey Preacher Man.. wannna know what I think?
- I want to be a pastor just like you

- Hey preacher, try making a point
- Hey preacher, I won't be ignored!
- Hey preacher, No more hell fire sermons please
- Hey preacher, I don't like your wife
- Hey preacher, your teeth are YELLOW
- Hey preacher, we need a JUMBOTRON 
- Hey preacher, Is that you? (anesthesiologist)

- Voo Doo Dolls? that's not exhortation! 
- NIV in a KJV crowd? 

- I hear VOICES - Pants em!! - Oxymoron

angel_and_devil.jpg (80893 bytes)
THE MAN OF MANY HATS 
- Greetings

- Geek the Preach, & Geek meets Greek 

- Adult Bookstore - Typo Newsletter
- Man of many hats - Crowd Control
- Wild & Crazy - Steroid Testing, and
getting the HOOK

STAFF MEETINGS
Paul visits your staff meeting
- Business MOSH PITS
- That was TOO MUCH - Corporate Sponsors?

MONEY MGMT.
- Eternal Security Giving - Pastor Poker Night

THEOLOGIES?
- No!.. the answer has always been NO!

BAPTISM CARTOONS

and finally.. THERE WILL BE A QUIZ



Last Updated: 05 December 2014
  • Bible Cartoons
  1. Drive to Church
  2. Choosing a Church
  3. Church and Root Canals
  4. Church Clock Sin

Subcategories

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