My daughter Lili was five when she received a foam CD holder with plastic sleeves for all her music CDs. I explained to her that CDs are sensitive to light and heat, so she should not leave the holder in the sun.

During our home addition, the electrician was working in the backyard and Lili had gone to play in the sandbox, leaving her new CD holder on the patio table. My wife saw it and told Lili she was going to put it in the house.

Lili stood up in the sandbox and said, "Mommy, make sure you put it where the sun doesn't shine!"

The electrician took a break.
Five things you don't want to hear from Tech Support:

1. "Duuuuuude! Bummer!"

2. "In layman's terms, we call that the Hindenburg Effect."

3. "Your problem can be fixed, but you're going to need a butter knife, a roll of duct tape and a car battery."

4. "Press 1 for Support.
Press 2 if you're with ‘60 minutes.'
Press 3 if you're with the FTC."

5. "Hold on a second, please ... Mom! Timmy's hitting me!"
A man in a supermarket was pushing a cart which contained, among other things, a screaming baby.

As the man proceeded along the aisles, he kept repeating softly, "Keep calm, Thomas. Don't get excited, Thomas. Don't yell, Thomas."

A lady watched with admiration and then said, "You are certainly to be commended for your patience in trying to quiet little Thomas."

"Lady," he declared, "I'M THOMAS!"
Dr. Mike Wilson asks his patient, "Which do you want first, the good news or the bad news?"

The patient replies, "Give me the good news."

Dr. Wilson says, "You're about to have a disease named after you."
Sister Mary Katherine entered the Monastery of Silence. The Priest said, "Sister, this is a silent monastery. You are welcome here as long as you like, but you may not speak until I direct you to do so."

Sister Mary Katherine lived in the monastery for 5 years before the Priest said to her, "Sister Mary Katherine, you have been here for 5 years. You can speak two words."

Sister Mary Katherine said: "Hard bed."

"I'm sorry to hear that," the Priest said, "We will get you a better bed."

After another 5 years, Sister Mary Katherine was called by the Priest. "You may say another two words, Sister Mary Katherine."

"Cold food," said Sister Mary Katherine, and the Priest assured her that the food would be better in the future.

On her 15th anniversary at the monastery, the Priest again called Sister Mary Katherine into his office. "You may say two words today."

"I quit," said Sister Mary Katherine.

"It's probably best," said the Priest.  "You've done nothing but complain since you got here."


Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you?  Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.

a picture of christmas ballsWe think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.

If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!

It's your turn to be funny.  Submit your funny caption today.

Are you looking for funny elephant pictures?  You've come to the right place!

Here are the games we have on the site so far.  There aren't many but they're loads of fun.

Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow.  We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often.  Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.

dog_maggie.jpgSome say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.

It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.

Here are some clean, theologically incorrect jokes.  Most of them have been featured in the PearlyGates section of the free Cybersalt Digest Newsletter - which you can subscribe to by clicking here.

catmelonhead150x127.jpgOver the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.

And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.

When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here.  If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!

These are some of our favorite cartoons.

Our collection of puns.

Our collection of funny signs.

Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.

Here's our funny horse pictures collection.

A great collection of clean, funny one-liners! 

christmas cakeWe think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.

We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

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