A real estate salesman had just closed his first deal, only to discover that the piece of land he had sold was completely under water.
"That customer's going to come back here pretty mad," he said to his boss. "Should I give him his money back?"
"Money back?" roared the boss. "What kind of salesman are you? Get out there and sell him a houseboat."
My parents have been married for almost 40 years.
Whenever anyone asks my Dad how they've stayed married for so long, he claims they are compatible. They both like to fight! He says that they have come to an agreement on one thing...
He doesn't try to run her life, and he doesn't try to run his.
Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.
As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
COFFEE.EXE missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key.
Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)
Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.
Backups! We don' NEED no steenking backups.
4 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.
E Pluribus Modem
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes
File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
Ethernet (n): Something used to catch the Etherbunny
Computers are not intelligent; they only think they are
A main-frame: The biggest PC peripheral available.
My software never has bugs. It just develops undocumented features.
An error? Impossible! My modem is error-correcting
C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL
CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C. (Y/N)?
Once I worked as an operator on an old IBM 370/Model 138 mainframe at a local college. My position had been reclassified to fall into a new area outside of the I/S staff.
One day, my new supervisor entered the room and stared at the air conditioning unit directly behind me. He studied the two flashing lights for a few moments and asked what job it was currently processing.
I killed my career by replying, "Actually, sir, it's cooling the room. The computer is over there."
A man and his wife were making their first doctor visit prior to the birth of their first child. After everything checked out, the doctor took a small stamp and stamped the wife's stomach with indelible ink.
The couple was curious about what the stamp was for, so when they got home, the husband dug out his magnifying glass to try to see what it was.
In very tiny letters, the stamp said, "When you can read this, come back and see me."
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
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