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[PearlyGates] Issue #0810

[PearlyGates] Issue #0810

The PearlyGates Newsletter

Featuring clean, theologically incorrect humor.


Issue #0810 


Cybersalt News - April 9, 2020

Chicken Thursday Marcia LOh look, Chicken Thursday!

Thanks to our friend Marcia L. for today's chicken picture. Here is her note about it:

Hi Tim – as I was reading Cybersalt today I realized I have a chicken pic I could send you! The attached is a snap of a painting done in Rosebud, Alberta to advertise the play, Chickens, by Lucia Frangione, performed there in 2014. It’s a hilarious and poignant play about the struggles on a chicken farm. All the characters are chickens, by the way. Never laughed so hard!

Also, thanks to Peg M. for letting me know that someone has been spoofing emails from me and spreading links to buy Cannabis Oil (CBD Oil.) Email spoofing is when someone sends out an email that looks like it is from someone else but it is not. If you get an email from me selling CBD you can know it's not from me because:
- My server security is set up so that nobody else can send to this list through the approved Cybersalt server. If you look at the headers of your email you will see it does not come from Cybersalt.
- Due to the pandemic, my supply of CBD Oil has been cut off.

Wash your hands, keep safe and enjoy the rest of today's mailing!

~ Pastor Tim


Here is today's PearlyGates item.

Knife Exercise

Big KnifeDuring a practical exercise at a military police base, the instructor was giving the class instruction in unarmed self-defense.

After he presented a number of different situations in which they might find themselves, he asked a student, "What steps would you take if someone were coming at you with a big, sharp knife?"

The student replied, "Big ones."


20 billion thumb"Be a Billionaire"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

The PearlyGates list features material that Pastor Tim thinks is funny but would probably generate emotionally fueled feedback if sent to his other more general and family safe lists. He knows the jokes are theologically, politically, and/or socially incorrect and he’s OK with that. And yes, he would tell these jokes to his mother, his children and even his church in certain public speaking situations where he is called pastor for reasons other than the jokes he tells.


The PearlyGates Newsletter is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

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