santaflatThanks to list member Chez Watts for sending me these things that he has heard while working as a Santa in Australia.

Pastor Tim, here are some more Santa interviews from last Christmas.

*Santa to 5-year-old girl:

Who is this?


What's his second name?

Bear.   [Dumb Santa]

*Santa to a 4 to 5-year-old male wearing Batman T-shirt:

Are you Batman?




Does Batman let you drive the Batmobile?

No but I can be Spiderman.

Are you good at climbing?

I'm not allowed.


I just got the plaster off from my arm.

What happened?

I fell out of the mango tree, but mum told the doctor I fell off the swing under the tree.

Did she lie?

No I'm not allowed in the mango tree because my brother broke his arm when he fell from the mango tree, and my brother said to tell mum I fell off the swing.

*Santa to 3-year-old female:

Hello ... why is your arm in plaster?

Because it hurts.

What makes it hurt?

The dog.

Did he bite you?

No, he pushed me in the pool.

And did you swim out yourself?

No the pool was empty, and dad was cleaning it.

*Santa to 13-year-old male standing by while his little brother sees Santa.

Why is your arm in plaster?

I hit a car.

With your arm?

No, a shopping trolley.

How did that break your arm?

I was in the trolley racing a friend.

*Santa to 3 to 4-year-old in Barbie Pink:

Are you a girl or a dollie?

A girl?

Are you sure?

Yes, a doll can't sing.

Do you sing in the shower?

No on the way to Sydney on the aeroplane.

Does that help you sing high notes?

No its from Ice Cream.

*Santa to a 4-year-old girl:

Why do you like that holiday motel so much. (Peregian beach).

Because its close to the beach and dad goes fishing and they have a bee and we have a fresh honey from the bee every day.

How many bees do they have?


Is she lonely?

She has friends in the garden where they meet.

Ho ho ho...

Did your dad catch many fish?

Dad says there are no more left, but don't tell mum.


He gets a big one from the shop on the way home.

And your mum doesn't know?

Yes but I can't tell daddy. She knows everything.

Like what?

When I jump on the bed. :)