Funny Newspaper Ads- 2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7 wks old, Perfect markings, 555-1234.  Leave mess.

- Lost: small apricot poodle.  Reward.  Neutered.  Like one of the family.

- Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.

- For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.

- Four-poster bed, 101 years old.  Perfect for antique lover.

- Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.

- We do not tear your clothing with machinery.  We do it carefully by hand.

- For Sale.  Three canaries of undermined sex.

- For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Hussy.

- Great Dames for sale.

- Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.

- Tired of cleaning yourself?  Let me do it.

- Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

- Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.