Navy Jokes

  • "Well," snarled the tough old Navy Chief to the bewildered Seaman. navy officer"I suppose after you get discharged from the Navy, you'll just be waiting for me to die so you can come and spit on my grave."

    "Not me, Chief!" the Seaman replied. 

    "Once I get out of the Navy, I'm never going to stand in line again!"

  • Swedish Warship PunWhy do Swedish warships have bar codes on the sides?

    So that when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.

  • military truckThe drill sergeant making his morning announcements to a group of newcomers in a training camp, stated:

    "Today, gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news.

    First, the good. Private Peters will be setting the pace on our morning run.' With this the platoon was overjoyed, as Private Peters was overweight and terribly slow.

  • officer navyA friend of mine joined the Navy and soon after had to attend a wedding. He asked an officer for a pass and was told he had to be back by 7 p.m. Sunday.

    "You don't understand, sir," my friend said. "I'm in the wedding."

    "No, YOU don't understand," the officer replied. "You're in the Navy."