Be nice to your hairstylist because what's stopping them from plucking one of your hairs and putting it at a crime scene? Nothing.
The cops came to my door today to say that my dog was chasing someone on a bike, but I told them they had the wrong house because my dog doesn't own a bike!
I wonder how long it will take this police sketch artist to realize I'm describing him?
My brother's a cop: Thought I'd buy him a pullover sweater for Christmas.
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