Police One-liners

  • haircutBe nice to your hairstylist because what's stopping them from plucking one of your hairs and putting it at a crime scene? Nothing.

  • police cruiserThe cops came to my door today to say that my dog was chasing someone on a bike, but I told them they had the wrong house because my dog doesn't own a bike!

  • pencilsI wonder how long it will take this police sketch artist to realize I'm describing him?

  • police pull overMy brother's a cop: Thought I'd buy him a pullover sweater for Christmas.