Royalty Jokes

  • bank punWe are all used to the conveniences of a modern bank.

    While there have been money lenders throughout the ages, full service banks are a relatively new phenomenon. Molan Cache is usually considered the man who developed modern banking as we know it today. He enlisted the aid of Tomas Benes, the Count of Prague and chief financial advisor of King Charles II. The two were able to convince the Bohemian monarch to finance this new experiment in banking.

    So really, credit should go to a Czech king, a count and Cache.

    ~ Stan Kegel

  • stampsI wonder if the queen gets into bed, pulls the duvet up to her neck and says, "Look, Phillip, I'm a stamp!"

  • Queen Elizabeth with GunRemember when the US election took so long to decide back in November of 2000?  Here's a classic joke from that time.

    London, 8th November 2000.

    To the citizens of the United States of America, Following your failure to elect a candidate as President of the USA to govern yourselves and, by extension, the free world, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence.

    Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume a monarch's duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories.

    To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, please comply with the following acts:

    1. Look up "revoke" in a dictionary 
    2. Learn at least the first 4 lines of "God save the Queen"
    3. Start referring to "soccer" as football 
    4. Declare war on Quebec

    Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776).

    Thank you for your cooperation and have a nice day!

    Sincerely, Elizabeth