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Belief Illustrations

  • Atheist HolidayAn atheist complained to a friend,

    "Christians have their special holidays, such as Christmas and Easter. Jews celebrate their holidays, such as Passover and Yom Kippur. Muslims have their holidays, such as The Holiday of Charity and The Commemoration of Abraham's Sacrifice. Every religion has its holidays. But we atheists," he said, "have no recognized national holidays. It's unfair discrimination, I say!"

    His friend replied, "Well, why don't you celebrate April first?"

  • supermanCharlie was playing with his little brother Mickey when the little boy asked whether he could fly like Superman.

    "Sure you can, Mickey," Charlie said. "Just flap your arms really hard."

    So Mickey climbed up on the windowsill, started flapping like mad, jumped, then smashed into the ground just a few inches below.

    Horrified, their mother came screaming into the room and said, "What happened?"

    Charlie said, "I was just teaching Mickey not to believe everything he's told."

  • chairA man's daughter had asked the local minister to come and pray with her father. When the minister arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows.

    An empty chair sat beside his bed.

    The minister assumed that the old fellow had been informed of his visit. "I guess you were expecting me," he said.

    'No, who are you?" said the father.

    The minister told him his name and then remarked, "I saw the empty chair and I figured you knew I was going to show up."

  • laundry machinesIt was 6 p.m., and I was about to leave the coin laundry where I was employed. My boss called me over and asked if I would mind dropping off someone's laundry on my way home.

    "It's for my cousin," she apologized, "who's eight months pregnant and can't get out much anymore." I cheerfully agreed and, driving to the address, knocked at the door. A little girl, the sister-to-be, answered.

    "Hi, there," I said with a big smile. "Is your mommy home?" Holding up the white bundle of clothes, I explained, "I have a delivery for her."

    The child's mouth dropped, and her eyes went wide.

    "Mom!" she shrieked. "Come quick! It's the stork!"

  • blind caneI was listening to a lady who called a radio pastor. The pastor was a wise, grandfatherly gentleman who has that calm reassuring voice that can melt all fear. The lady, who was obviously crying, said, "Pastor, I was born blind, and I've been blind all my life. I don't mind being blind but I have some well meaning friends who tell me that if I had more faith I could be healed."

  • cake eatSometimes we wonder, "What did I do to deserve this?" or "Why did God have to do this to me?" Here is a wonderful explanation!

    A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away. Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, "Absolutely Mom, I love your cake."

    "Here, have some cooking oil," her Mother offers.

    "Yuck," says her daughter.

  • hand man"In His Hands"

    We know not what tomorrow brings although we plan ahead

    For only God alone can know the pathway we must tread.

    We cannot know the future - not one minute nor one hour -

    Each circumstance that we must face lay only in His power.

  • cross“If God had perceived that our greatest need was economic, he would have sent an economist.

    If he had perceived that our greatest need was entertainment, he would have sent us a comedian or an artist.

    If God had perceived that our greatest need was political stability, he would have sent us a politician.

    If he had perceived that our greatest need was health, he would have sent us a doctor.

    But he perceived that our greatest need involved our sin, our alienation from him, our profound rebellion, our death;

    ... and he sent us a Savior. ”

    ― D.A. Carson, A Call to Spiritual Reformation: Priorities from Paul and His Prayers

  • calendarAn atheist was quite incensed over the preparation for Easter and Passover holidays and decided to contact the local ACLU about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while the atheists had no holidays for them to celebrate.

    The ACLU jumped on the opportunity to once again pick up the cause of the downtrodden and assigned their sharpest attorney to the case.

  • farmerA very zealous soul-winning young preacher recently came upon a farmer working in his field. Being concerned about the farmer's soul, the preacher asked the man, "Are you laboring in the vineyard of the Lord, my good man?"

    Not even looking at the preacher and continuing his work, the farmer replied, "Naw, these are soybeans."

    "You don't understand," said the preacher. "Are you a Christian?"

  • couple oldBernie and Esther were not the most religious couple and in fact, they really only went to church once a year.

    As they were leaving the church, the minister said, "Bernie, it sure would be nice to see you and Esther here more than once a year!"

    "I know," replied Bernie, "but at least we keep the Ten Commandments."

    "That's great," the minister said. "I'm glad to hear that you keep the Commandments."

    "Yep," Bernie said proudly, "Esther keeps six of them and I keep the other four."

  • prayer2In a small Midwestern conservative town, a business owner began to construct a building for a new bar. The local Baptist church started a campaign to block the bar from opening with petitions and prayers.

    Work progressed, however, right up until the week before opening, when a lightning strike hit the bar and it burned to the ground.

    The church folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, until the bar owner sued the church on the grounds that the church was ultimately responsible for the demise of his building, either through direct or indirect actions or means.

    In its reply to the court, the church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise.

    As the case made its way into court, the judge looked over the paperwork at the hearing and commented, "I don't know how I'm going to decide this, but as it appears from the paperwork, we have a bar owner who believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that doesn't!"

  • sky raysTo the ARTIST He is the One Altogether Lovely.

    To the ARCHITECT He is the Chief Corner Stone.

    To the BAKER He is the Living Bread.

    To the BANKER He is the Hidden Treasure.

    To the BIOLOGIST He is the Life.

    To the BUILDER He is the Sure Foundation.

    To the CARPENTER He is the Door.

  • winter tireOne October, my wife and I spent a vacation on Washington's Olympic Peninsula. We were eager to visit the rain forests near the coast, but we heard that snow slides had made some of the roads impassable. Although apprehensive about the conditions we might run into, we drove on.

    Sure enough, we had gone only a short way up the High Rain Forest road when we saw a sign: "Ice 10 miles."

  • Children's thoughts about Heaven.Mom, God's so neat, and heaven's supposed to be so great. Could me and Michael go there Saturday for a sleep-over?

    ---

    Our seven-year-old daughter, Clarisa, was not really excited about going to Sunday school, but her little friend talked her into it. After the first class, at lunch, she said, "I like my teacher, and she said if I come to Sunday school every Sunday, she'll show me how I can get a free trip to heaven."

  • man sadAre you standing at "Wits End Corner,"
    Christian, with troubled brow?
    Are you thinking of what is before you,
    And all you are bearing now?

    Does all the world seem against you,
    And you in the battle alone?
    Remember, at "Wits End Corner,"
    Is where God's power is shown.