Student Puns

  • whiteboardWhiteboards... they're remarkable.

  • bankThank-you student loans for getting me through university. 

    I don't think I can ever repay you!

  • chemistryWanna talk about Sodium? Na

    Nitric Oxide? NO

    Potassium? K

    Can we talk about Sulfer, Uranium and Rhenium now?  SURe

    How about Oxygen, Hydrogen, Sulfer, Sodium and Phosphorous? OH SNaP!

  • Karl MarxI dropped out of communism class: lousy Marx.

  • Roman Numeral punI have trouble with Roman numerals until I get to 159.

    Then it CLIX.

  • professor in class"The professor discovered that his theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground."

  • man magician"What's your father's occupation?" asked the school secretary on the first day of the new academic year.

    "He's a magician, Ma'am" said Little Johnny.

    "How interesting. What's his favorite trick?"

    "He saws people in half."

    "Wow! Now, next question. Any brothers or sisters?"

    "One half brother and two half sisters."

  • periodic table#121 Um 298.7 - the element of confusion.

  • fish schoolWhen fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

  • flower bunchA teacher was telling her class about plant names that have the word "dog" in them: dog-rose, dogwood, dog violet.

    She asked the class if they could name another flower with the preface "dog."

    Steven raised his hand and said, "Sure Miss Jones. How about a 'collie' flower!"

  • man stressedI didn't like my beard at first.

    Then it grew on me.

  • living roomHey Archimedes, I love what you've done with displace!

  • Cornbread is square.Pi R squared.

    Nooo! Pie R round; cornbread R square.

  • milestoneMilestone: Throw a rock 5,280 feet.

  • children3No matter how kind you are, German children are always kinder.

  • bakerySaid the Thesaurus at the bakery, "I'd like a synonym bun!"

  • popI know a lot about pop; I guess you could say I'm a Fizzisist.

  • girl2We just had a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory.

    I hope there is no pop quiz.

  • pencilsBroken pencils are pointless!

  • dinosaurA dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary: Athesaurus.