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Valentines Jokes

  • If You Love Something Variations

    loveyouTHE ORIGINAL VERSION:

    If you love something,
    Set it free...
    If it comes back, it's yours;
    If it doesn't, it never was yours.

    THE PESSIMIST VERSION:

    If you love somebody,
    Set her free...
    If she ever comes back, she's yours;
    If she doesn't, well, as expected, she never was.

    THE OPTIMIST VERSION:

    If you love somebody,

  • Valentine Puns

    VAlentine puns chocolatesPlease, under no circumstances think that I do not realize the following Valentine puns are anything other than painful and torturous. But for those who like that flavor of the genre, here you go, lol!


    What do farmers give their wives on Valentine's Day?
    A hog and kisses!


    Why did the pig give his girlfriend a box of candy?
    It was Valenswine's Day!


  • Valentine's Back

    Hopefully this is not your Valentine's back
    when Valentines is back.

    A picture of a Valentine heart chaeved into a guy's back.

  • Valentine's Day

    heart shaped_flower_petal_copyAfter she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it means?"

    "You'll know tonight." he said.

    That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife.

    Delighted, she opened it to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams".