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Listening One-liners

  • man thinkingMy wife just stopped and said, "You weren't even listening were you?"

    I thought... "That's a pretty weird way to start a conversation."

  • sign wrong wayIf I could only use one word to describe myself, it would probably be: "not good at following directions."

  • awkward silenceThe next time there's an awkward silence, try whispering, "Did you forget your line?"

  • ostrichIf anything is on your mind, get it off your chest.

  • man laughHe who laughs last thinks slowest.

  • mistakeNo one is listening until you make a mistake.

  • electrical cordDon't wear headphones while vacuuming; I've just finished the whole house before realizing the vacuum wasn't plugged in.

  • man afraidI'm not so sure about an inner child, but I have an inner idiot that surfaces every now and then.

  • donkey in mirrorAskhole: A person who constantly asks for your advice, yet always does the opposite of what you told them.

  • quote 1545

    The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.

    - Stephen R. Covey

  • quote 1615

    "The ability to speak several languages is an asset, but the ability to keep your mouth shut in any language is priceless."

    - Unknown

  • quote 1765

    "Listening is the highest form of hospitality... not to change people but offering them space where change can take place."

    - Henri Nouwen