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Love Jokes

  • If You Love Something Variations

    loveyouTHE ORIGINAL VERSION:

    If you love something,
    Set it free...
    If it comes back, it's yours;
    If it doesn't, it never was yours.

    THE PESSIMIST VERSION:

    If you love somebody,
    Set her free...
    If she ever comes back, she's yours;
    If she doesn't, well, as expected, she never was.

    THE OPTIMIST VERSION:

    If you love somebody,

  • Waiting at the Door

    dog4I was hospitalized for a few days, and my wife reported that my dog really missed me. "She spends the night at the front door, awaiting your return," she said.

    "What an example of true love," I replied. "I wonder if you'd be that concerned about me?"

    "Honey," my wife answered, "if you were gone overnight, and I didn't know where you were, you can be sure I'd be waiting for you at the front door."