What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Why did the cows return to the marijuana field?
It was the pot calling the cattle back.
A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and began circling his head.
Wouldn't you know it, the bug flew right into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it until the bug squirted out into his bucket.
It went in one ear and out the udder.
Equine Opportunities: If the horses ever realize the barn door isn't locked, they're gonna have a field day.
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose.
I tried taking some high-res pictures of some local farmland;
but they all turned out really grainy.
Forbidden fruits create many jams.
Thanks to Walter McLauren for today's CleanPun.
I saw this farmer standing beside the road holding a dead chicken.
I asked him what happened and he said, "It tried to cross in front of my truck, and now it's a poultrygeist."