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Microsoft Jokes

  • Biblical Spokespersons

    bible personWhat if Biblical characters could be recruited as high-tech promoters?

    Consider the following tech advocates and their ad slogans:

    Noah for Match.com: We can find a mate for anything. Why not you?

    Moses for the Excedrin Headache Resource Center (Excedrin.com):
    Take two tablets and call me in the morning.

    The dove for UPS.com: Guaranteed delivery in 40 days and 40 nights.

  • Signs you aren't very competent with a computer

    computer keyboardSigns you aren't very competent with a computer:

    - You've backed-up your desktop by pushing it against the wall.

    - You've put foam around the computer to prevent it from crashing.

    - The soles of your shoes are worn out from re-booting your computer.

    - You try to clear the screen by shaking the monitor up and down.

    - You're Amish.

  • Waterology

    milk2I'm sure you've heard the old story referring to optimism and pessimism that is determined by whether you think the glass is half-empty or half-full. Here are the reactions when somebody leaves a half glass of milk next to the keyboard.

    Optimist:
    The glass is half full.

    Pessimist:
    The glass is half empty.

    Apple Computer:
    You guys really oughta be drinking Perrier.