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Hygiene Jokes

  • tooth brush"I dropped the toothpaste!"

    - says Tom, crestfallen

  • child boyMy son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet.

    So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage.

    Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush.

    He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago."

  • showerheadSinging in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it just becomes a soap opera!

  • womanI know I'm never going to understand women.

    I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root . . . .

    and still be afraid of a spider.

  • computer2(Sung to the tune of "Winter Wonderland")

    Doorbell rings, I'm not list'nin',
    From my mouth, drool is glist'nin',
    I'm happy -- although
    My boss let me go --
    Happily addicted to the Web.

    All night long, I sit clicking,
    Unaware time is ticking,
    There's beard on my cheek,
    Same clothes for a week,
    Happily addicted to the Web!