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Occupation Puns

  • alligatorFlorida News: Now they are using alligators to make belts....

    It's amazing what you can get alligators to do.

  • children snow"My dad is a doctor. I can get sick for nothing," bragged one little boy.

    "Big deal," said his friend. "My dad is a minister, and I can be good for nothing." 

  • A panel of doctors was asked for their opinions concerning a proposal to build a new wing to their hospital. This was what they said:

    doctor4The Allergists voted to scratch it. 

    The Dermatologists preferred no rash moves. 

    The Psychiatrists thought it was madness. 

    The Radiologists could see right through it. 

    The Gastroenterologists had a gut feeling about it. 

  • plumb lineSurveying the job market: Look for a plumb assignment hanging weights from a string.

  • man dinerLousy Restaurant... I have my reservations.

  • face puzzledI used to be indecisive. But now I am not so sure.

  • shovel2The invention of the shovel was ground breaking, but it was the invention of the broom that truly swept the nation. You will agree however, that it was the wheel that really got things rolling.