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Ocean Puns

  • purpleA blue ship crashed with a red ship.

    The survivors were marooned.

  • cruise shipMen, if you went on a cruise ship during your summer vacation and you met a woman and fell in love, here's some advice my wise old Uncle Waldo once told me:

    "There's a 50/50 chance that someday you'll wind up very she sick."

  • Porpoise punA research group on sea mammals captured a rather odd porpoise on one of its trips. Its peculiarity was that it had feet. After they had photographed and measured the poor thing, they prepared to set it free.

    "Wait a minute," said one of the researchers, "Wouldn't it be a kindness if our ship's doctor here were to amputate the feet so that it would be like other porpoises?"

    "Not on your life," exclaimed the doctor, "That would be defeeting the porpoise."

  • dolphinGlass Dolphin: clarity of porpoise.

  • eelI had a dream last night that I knighted an electric fish...

    It was Sir Eel.

  • eel morayDean Martin as a scuba instructor: "That's a moray."