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Chicken Jokes

  • Chicken and Rice

    chicken and riceI love Chinese food as much as the next guy, but you'll never convince me a chicken fried this rice.

  • Chicken Recipe

    chicken cookedBaked Stuffed Chicken

    6-7 lb. chicken
    1 cup melted butter
    1 cup stuffing
    1 cup uncooked popcorn
    salt/pepper to taste

    Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

  • Chickens in the Sack

    chickensIf you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one here

    There were two Goobers walking toward each other down the street.

    One Goober was carrying a sack.

    When they met up, the second Goober asked, "Whatcha got in that there sack?"

    The Goober with the sack replied, "Just some chickens."

    The second Goober said, "If I guess how many chickens are in that there sack, can I have one?"

    The first Goober answered, "I'll give ya both of them if you get it right."

    So, the second Goober thought and thought. Finally he guessed. "Five?"

  • Eggsacting Solution

    chickensA man was having trouble getting his neighbor to keep his chickens fenced in. The neighbor kept talking about chickens being great creatures, and as such they had the right to go where they wanted.

    The man was having no luck keeping the chickens out of his yard and ruining his flower beds. He had tried everything.

    Two weeks later, a friend noticed his flower beds were doing great. The flowers were beginning to bloom.

  • Oneliner #0958

    Chicken or Egg First?I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon: I’ll let you know...

  • Oneliner #0982

    chickens"If everything tastes like us, why do we have to die?"
    - Chickens

  • Prepared Chicken

    chickens"May I take your order?" the waiter asked.

    "Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?"

    "Nothing special, sir," he replied.

    "We just tell them straight out that they're going to die."

  • Trooper Delivery

    chicken kentucky fried storeOne day a State Trooper was pulling off an expressway near Chicago.

    When he turned onto the street at the end of the ramp, he noticed someone at a chicken place getting into his car. The driver placed the bucket of chicken on top of his car, got in and drove off with the bucket still on top of his car.

    The trooper pursued him, pulled him over and walking up to the car he pulled the bucket off the roof and offered it to the driver.

    The driver looked at the trooper and said, "No thanks, I just bought some."

  • What Gives You?

    Preamble: As I hope you know, understand, and even appreciate, the PearlyGates list/section features clean, theologically and/or politically incorrect jokes and humor. I mention this as an introduction to how I came to hear this joke.

    If you follow Cybersalt on Facebook, you may have seen a link that was shared to an article entitled "10 Reasons Why Jesus would never win the American evangelical vote." This spurred some comments and discussion and at the end of one post by Kyle Hawkins (shout out to Kyle!) he shared this joke. 

    chickensI mention this because if you don't like this joke you can go to that Facebook discussion and flame Kyle instead of me, lol. While you are there, I hope you'll also praise Kyle for the gentle and gracious manner in which he took part in the discussion. And, yes, basically I also trying to get you to follow Cybersalt on FaceBook.