Medical One-liners

  • Negative Result

    medical chartsThey told me I had Type A blood, but it was a Type O.

  • Oneliner #1104

    computer keyboardI accidentally typed my symptoms into IMDB instead of WebMD and it told me I have Gary Busey.

  • Oneliner #1105

    dog8"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face."

    - Ben Williams

  • Oneliner #1107

    warningEvery warning label has an awesome backstory.

  • Oneliner #1163

    medic alert I just ordered a life alert bracelet so if I ever get a life I'll be notified immediately!

  • Oneliner #1198

    shoppingI used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes...

  • Operation Hope

    doctor fileThe surgeons say they might be able to fix my mangled hands: Fingers crossed!