watch faceSt. Peter becomes aware of a man standing outside the Gates of Heaven, pacing up and down. "Excuse me, can I help you?" he asks.

"No, it's all right. It won't be long" and he distractedly looks at his watch, shrugs and paces on. 

St. Peter gives it another 5 minutes and asks again. 

The man stops and says, "Look, you know I'm dead. I know I'm dead. Will someone please tell the cardiac arrest team?"