Monthly Archive

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? read more..

Two robins were sitting in a tree. "I'm really hungry," said the first one. "Let's fly down and find some lunch." They flew down to the ground and found a nice plot of newly plowed ground that was ful... read more..

A fella walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him what he had.He said, "Shingles."So she took down his name, address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat. Fifteen ... read more..

If a rabbit is raised indoors, would it be an ingrown hare?... read more..

An inflatable student goes to his inflatable school and is having a really bad day. Bored in history lesson, he gets up and walks out. Walking down the corridor, he sees the inflatable headmaster wa... read more..

The geek shall inherit the earth.... read more..

A man is struck in the head by a rock during a heated demonstration. A woman rushes over, kneels down and places his head in her lap."Are you comfortable?" she asks."Oh, I do okay." he replied. "Som... read more..

The chef at a family-run restaurant had broken her leg and came into our insurance office to file a disability claim.As I scanned the claim form, I did a double take.Under "Reason unable to work," she... read more..

A scientist found, to his great surprise, that he was lactose intolerant (unable to digest milk sugar). At dinner that night with his two young daughters (age 9 and 4 years), he mentioned that he had ... read more..

Jim was having reasonable success playing the stock market when George expressed a desire to give it a try. Jim advised him on what stocks to buy, what to stay clear of, etc. In his list of "pointer... read more..

As income tax time approaches, did you ever notice:When you put the two words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "THEIRS"... read more..

"An unemployed jester is nobody's fool." read more..

An unemployed jester is nobody's fool.... read more..

My 17-year-old niece asked me if she could use my name as a reference on her resume', which she planned to submit to a local fast-food restaurant. I agreed. A few days later she called and asked me ... read more..

A show business museum in Hollywood is presenting an exhibit on the career of the late and great actor John Wayne.One of the featured items is a pair of yellowy-brownish colored gravestones bearing hi... read more..

Q. What does a reindeer say before telling you a (bad) joke?A. "This will sleigh you."... read more..

A Preacher was doing his "Children's Church" sermon where all the youngsters come down front and hear a story. The pastor was discussing the story of Jonah. He quoted the scriptures from Jonah, "...... read more..

If you have a use for another clean joke, here's an original. (Darren Marlar distributed it through his Unnamed Daily radio prep site last year).A youth pastor thoroughly enjoyed movie night with his... read more..

An American in Scotland asked one of the locals, "Why do you call it a kilt?"The Scotsman replied, "Because we kilt the last bloke who called it a dress."... read more..

It is a little-known fact that King Arthur had more knights than is usually believed. They included:~ Sir Face - the devastatingly handsome, but disappointingly shallow knight~ Sir Pass - Arthur's bes... read more..

King Ozymndias of Assyria was running low on cash after years of war with the Hittites. His last great possession was the Star of the Euphrates, the most valuable diamond in the ancient world. Despera... read more..

A somewhat advanced society has figured how to package basic knowledge in pill form. A student, needing some learning, goes to the pharmacy and asks what kind of knowledge pills are available. The pha... read more..

A man had been feeling unwell for about 3 weeks and went to see his doctor.The doctor told him, "I don't know what you've got but it could be serious so I'm sending you to the Rare Disease Specialist.... read more..

Microbiology Lab: Staph Only!... read more..

My wife was in labor with our first child. Things were going pretty well when suddenly she began to shout, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! CAN'T!""Doctor, what's wrong with my wife!" I cried."It's per... read more..

What did Sir Lancelot wear to bed?A knight-gown.... read more..

I hate the speed bump in the laneway of my complex. But I just get over it and move on.... read more..

"Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum."(A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.)"Domino vobiscum."(The pizza guy's here.)"Sharpei diem."(Sei read more..

A photographer was hired to take pictures at a lawyers' convention.When he lined up his subjects he got them to look their best by shouting, "Okay everyone, say fees!"... read more..

Clothes don't necessarily make the man, but a good suit makes a lawyer.... read more..