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More Jokes

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  • cooking

    Cooking Terms

    Tongue: a variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses the line between a…
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    Bike Training

    Never having learned to ride a bicycle as a child, I finally decided to do it in my late…
  • milk

    Milkman Notes

    These notes left for milkmen came from the UK, so you'll notice a slight, endearing…
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    Signs of Aging

    You know you're getting older if:1. You and your teeth don't sleep together.2. Your try…
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    Breakfast Call

    When my son was in the ninth grade, we reluctantly agreed to let him move into the…
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    Dog Employee

    A salesman dropped in to see a business customer. Not a soul was in the office except a…
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    Modern Day Proverbs

    ON DEEP THOUGHTS A day without sunshine is like night. ON PARADOX AND RETURN POLICIES…
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    Spelling Bee Confusing

    If GH can stand for P as in HiccoughIf OUGH stands for O as in DoughIf PHTH stands for T…
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    Geese V

    Q: Why is one side of the V geese make always shorter than the other? ........... A:…
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    Sermon Follow-Up

    A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To…
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    Boris, Bill, & Bill

    Boris Yeltsin, Bill Clinton and Bill Gates were invited to have dinner with God. During…
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    E-mail Problem

    The start of the new school term always brings out the most interesting questions for…
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    Birthday-Anniversary

    A man entered a stationery store and asked the clerk for a 'birthday/anniversary card.'…
  • judges gavel

    Duelling Judges

    Tyler and Katz, two judges, were each arrested on speeding charges. When they arrived in…

microphoneDumb Sports Quotes

*"And here's Moses Kiptanui, the 19 year old Kenyan, who turned 20 a few weeks ago." 
(David Coleman)

*"Its a great advantage to be able to hurdle with both legs." 
(David Coleman)

*"We now have exactly the same situation as we had at the start of the race, only exactly the opposite." 
(Murray Walker)

*Jimmy Hill: "Don't sit on the fence Terry. What chance do you think Germany has of getting through? 
Terry Venables: "I think it's 50-50."

*"I was in a no-win situation, so I'm glad that I won rather than lost."
(Frank Bruno)

*"There is Brendan Foster, by himself, with 20,000 people." 
(David Coleman)

*"The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical." 
(Murray Walker)

*"I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father." 
(Greg Norman)

*"There have been injuries and deaths in boxing, but none of them serious."
(Alan Minter)

*"Watch the time. It gives you an indication of how fast they are running."
(Ron Pickering)

*"That's inches away from being millimeter perfect." 
(Ted Lowe)

*"The Queen's Park Oval, exactly as its name suggests, is absolutely round."
(Tony Crozier)

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