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More Jokes

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    God Will Provide

    A young woman brings home her fiance to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells…
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    Walk-in Scream

    A woman went to a walk-in clinic, where she was seen by a young, new doctor. After about…
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    New Apartment

    A property manager of single-family residence was showing a unit to prospective tenants…
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    Worm Stubborn

    Little Josh was brought to Dr Gill cause he hadn't eaten anything for days. Dr Gill…
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    Perspective

    An English professor wrote the words, "a woman without her man is nothing" on the…
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    Peter's Portrait

    One semester when my brother, Peter, attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis,…
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    Perley Moore Buys a Truck

    There was a farmer, Perley Moore, who had recently bought a truck and found that the…
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    Cinderella Question

    The tax accountant had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter…
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    New Neighbor

    My quiet Saturday morning ended abruptly when my 12-year-old son, Billy, and one of his…
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    Movie Night

    My wife was complaining that I spend too much time on the computer, and not enough time…
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    Typo Apology

    "We apologize for the error in the last edition, in which we stated that 'Mr Fred Nicolme…
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    Special Message

    "Skipper," the sailor said to his captain as he saluted, "A special message just came in…
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    Not Likely

    In my sociology class, we were instructed to write down answers to some questions the…
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    White Gloves

    Frequent hand washing in my job as a medical technologist and the harsh weather combined…
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    Pastor's Golf Sunday

    There was this preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get, he could be…

microphoneDumb Sports Quotes

*"And here's Moses Kiptanui, the 19 year old Kenyan, who turned 20 a few weeks ago." 
(David Coleman)

*"Its a great advantage to be able to hurdle with both legs." 
(David Coleman)

*"We now have exactly the same situation as we had at the start of the race, only exactly the opposite." 
(Murray Walker)

*Jimmy Hill: "Don't sit on the fence Terry. What chance do you think Germany has of getting through? 
Terry Venables: "I think it's 50-50."

*"I was in a no-win situation, so I'm glad that I won rather than lost."
(Frank Bruno)

*"There is Brendan Foster, by himself, with 20,000 people." 
(David Coleman)

*"The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical." 
(Murray Walker)

*"I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father." 
(Greg Norman)

*"There have been injuries and deaths in boxing, but none of them serious."
(Alan Minter)

*"Watch the time. It gives you an indication of how fast they are running."
(Ron Pickering)

*"That's inches away from being millimeter perfect." 
(Ted Lowe)

*"The Queen's Park Oval, exactly as its name suggests, is absolutely round."
(Tony Crozier)

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