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More Jokes

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    Parenting Test

    MESS TEST Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the Wet…
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    Resume Cover Letters

    These were taken from real Resumes and Cover Letters, and were printed in "Fortune"…
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    New Phonetic Alphabet

    The same old standard phonetic alphabet (which you would use to describe spelling…
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    Rewiring

    Because our former small-town parish was not a wealthy one, our pastor was dependent on…
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    Geraniums

    A man walked into a flower shop and after looking around for several minutes, asked the…
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    Garage Keys

    The man passed out in a dead faint as he came out of his front door onto the porch.…
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    Spin the Bottle

    "We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle and if it…
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    Odd News Reports

    Odd News Reports.....*"The license fee for altered dogs with a certificate will be $3 and…
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    Noise Abatement

    "Flight 1234," the control tower advised, "turn right 45 degrees for noise…
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    Something Nice For Dad

    Unable to attend the funeral after his father died, a son who lived far away called his…
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    Finkel's Fine

    A little woman called Mount Sinai Hospital. She said, Hello, darling, I'd like to talk…
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    Summer Camp

    A counselor was helping his kids put their stuff away on their first morning in Summer…
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    Pants Dilemma

    A young man came home from the office and found his bride sobbing convulsively. "I feel…
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    Tough Teacher

    A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of…
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    Cell Phone Flight Call

    En route to Hawaii, I noticed one of my passengers in the coach section of the airplane…

My job as a land surveyor took me to a golf course that was expanding from 9 holes to 18 holes.

Using a machete to clear thick brush in an area I was mapping, I came upon a golf club that an irate player must have tossed away. It was in good condition, so I picked it up and continued on.

When I broke out of the brush onto a putting green, two golfers stared at me in awe. I had a machete in one hand, a golf club in the other, and behind me was a clear-cut swath leading out of the woods.

"There," said one of the golfers, "is a guy who hates to lose his ball!"

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