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    Stolen Turkey

    Ducking into confession with a turkey in his arms, Brian said, "Forgive me, Father, for I…
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    Dining Out

    The waitress comes over and recognizes the family seated at the table; Mr. & Mrs. Smith…
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    Ah, Mozart

    A married couple trying to live up to a snobbish lifestyle went to a party. The…
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    Windy Walk

    So George goes out on a really windy night to walk over and visit his friend Sam, who is…
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    Ecumenical Small Talk

    My Protestant clergy friend was speaking with a Catholic priest and wanted to make a…
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    Refined Shopping

    A very refined young man comes to a small food shop and sees fruit. "Give me two…
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    Razor Request

    Ronnie goes down to the barber shop. He gets his hair cut and then he is getting a shave.…
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    Baby Growth

    Our first three babies, all girls, each weighed about seven pounds at birth. When our…
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    Living History Museum

    Marv took his family to visit a living history museum, which included seeing houses and…
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    Cancelling Cards

    Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is so priceless, and so easy to…
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    Sermon Comment

    After a very long and boring sermon the parishioners filed out of the church saying…
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    Namesake Care

    While I was serving as a chief master sergeant at Barksdale Air Force Base in Bossier…
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    Found Money

    An elderly married couple who were childhood sweethearts and had settled down in their…
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    Crocheted Dolls

    There was once a man and woman who had been married for more than 60 years. They had…
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A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary.

Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer.

The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."

John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued, "May I ask what the turkey did?"

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